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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25616158">Five times Crowley got summoned and one time he didn't</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zeckarin/pseuds/Zeckarin'>Zeckarin</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>And they were roomates... (but there were two beds) [38]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman &amp; Terry Pratchett</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Aziraphale is Good With Kids (Good Omens), Aziraphale is a stubborn bastard, BAMF Aziraphale (Good Omens), Creepy Sandalphon (Good Omens), Crowley is Bad at Being a Demon (Good Omens), Crowley is Good With Kids (Good Omens), Demon Summoning, Gen, Hellfire, Holy Water, Hurt Crowley, Hurt/Comfort, I'm honestly not surprised to see these last two tags existed already, More tags to be added, Queerplatonic Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens), Sandalphon Being an Asshole (Good Omens), Snake Crowley (Good Omens), Summoning, Summoning Circles</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 08:22:02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>18,789</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25616158</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zeckarin/pseuds/Zeckarin</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Summoning circles and invocations didn't exist in the beginning. In fact, it took almost four millennia before it got invented.<br/>Then things started to go awry, specially for a certain demon.<br/>Or five times Crowley got into real trouble and one time he had fun.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Aziraphale &amp; Crowley (Good Omens)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>And they were roomates... (but there were two beds) [38]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1523585</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>115</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>220</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Prologue</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/megzseattle/gifts">megzseattle</a>.</li>



    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>BAMF Aziraphale guaranteed^^<br/>I'll add tags with every chapter.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <strong>571 BC, Babylon.</strong>
</p><p>It was a hot afternoon as Aziraphale made his way through the crowd, trying not to grimace at the bodies pressing against him. He would usually avoid the market at such an hour, but the feeling of a very familiar occult presence had lured him here, and he was trailing after it like a hound dog.</p><p>Finally, a tuft of ginger hair caught his sight, right in front of him. He reached out with a relieved smile.</p><p>“Is that you, Crawly?”</p><p>The red haired man startled and turned as the angelic hand landed lightly on his shoulder. Aziraphale drew back hastily, blushing in shame. This face was human, stranger, and angry. “Oh… I am ever so sorry! I… I mistook you for my fr… for an acquaintance.”</p><p>The man squinted his eyes, and several other humans positioned near him, hands on the hilt of their weapons. The angel suddenly recognized the engravings on the ginger’s jewelry.</p><p><em>Oh dear</em>.</p><p>Of course he had to go and anger one of the king’s counsellors. Just his luck. Not that it was any news to him. Higher authorities seemed to always take an instant dislike to him, were they ethereal or human.</p><p>“How dare you touch his lordship Neriglissar, you peasant!”</p><p>The angel’s eyes widened. This was not just any counsellor. It was the king’s son-in-law! The mean one, at that.</p><p>
  <em>Bother. There will be paperwork.</em>
</p><p>“I assure you, this is a dreadful mistake… I would never have… really you must believe me...” stuttered Aziraphale, hands fluttering. He smiled nervously as the men in arms surrounded him. The crowd, as every crowd knew how to do, had scattered and left the market place bare save the small, angry group of humans and the nervous Principality.</p><p>The all too familiar sound of a blade sliding out of its scabbard had the angel’s anxious smile disappear entirely.</p><p><em>Paperwork!</em> Squeaked a voice inside his head.</p><p>Then the cold, choking sensation of bloodlust receded, swiftly replaced by fear. The men took several steps back, swords falling to the ground, and Aziraphale felt cold scales brushing his ankle. Relief overflowed him.</p><p>“<strong>Fuck off, you sstupid creaturesss, before I dessstroy you all</strong>,” hissed a dark voice right behind the angel’s head."<strong>Thiss one is off limitsss</strong>."</p><p>“Crawly!” exclaimed Aziraphale, delighted, turning on his heels. He blinked, looking up and down at the giant snake. “Oh, my… not going for inconspicuous today, I gather?”</p><p>“Your talent at deduction isss unparalleled, Aziraphale,” was the deadpan answer. “Follow me, you moron.”</p><p>With a half hearted glare, Aziraphale complied, noticing the humans running out of their way, whispering from the side and, for the most part, bowing as Crawly passed them. Their destination didn’t surprise him very much, but he still tutted disapprovingly at the entry to the building.</p><p>“A temple, my dear? Are you trying to pass yourself as a god again?”</p><p>“Purely work related, angel. Come on in, I’ve got wine.”</p><p>“Oh, well… I imagine thwarting you will be easier if I stay close.”</p><p>“Definitely," answered the demon, changing into his human form. "Imagine everything I could do without you ready to smite me. I could… eat children, or something like that.”</p><p>Aziraphale politely disguised his laugh as a cough. Crawly pretended not to notice it. They both settled on the decadent amount of cushions that was, as far as Aziraphale could guess, supposed to be the fake snake-god’s nest. Crawly poured the wine and handed it to his adversary in comfortable silence.</p><p>“I haven’t seen you in this form in a long time… why, you were almost as large as you were in Eden. Is there a reason?” asked the angel, taking a sip and humming in delight.</p><p>Crawly grimaced. “Yeah. Shouldn’t talk about it, but...”</p><p>Aziraphale raised a hand. “Do not tell me, then. I certainly don’t want to know if it can bring you trouble.”</p><p>The demon huffed in annoyance. “Shadup, stupid. I don’t want Heaven to know about it, but I have to tell you. I’m here to supervise the building of a temple.”</p><p>“Isn’t… this a temple already?” asked the angel, waving around them.</p><p>“Nah, it’s a small and old one. I’m talking huge, angel. Big temple! Like… something really big. To Beelzebub.”</p><p>This time, Aziraphale’s cough was genuine.</p><p>“I beg your pardon? Beelzebub? Why?”</p><p>“They like them here, Nebuchadnezzar’s a fan. They talked a lot.”</p><p>The angel paled and jumped to his feet, looking around in anguish. “One of the Princes of Hell is here, in this town? Crawly, they must have sensed my presence! They’ll know I’m talking to you!”</p><p>Crawly rolled his eyes. “Oh, for fuck’s sake, sit down, you ridiculous angel! Don’t you think I would have mentioned it first if they were still here?”</p><p>Biting his lips, Aziraphale sat down. “Sorry, dear boy. Of course you would have.”</p><p>“You’re so annoying. Is that your first concern, really? That they would know you’re <em>talking to me?</em> Don’t you think you being destroyed by an Archdemon would be a little more alarming? Honest, angel, it’s like you have a death wish!”</p><p>“But I don’t want you to get into trouble because of me!”</p><p>Crawly let out a long suffering sigh. “<em>Anyway</em>,” he finally huffed, “They’re not here anymore. Talked with the king for a few weeks, then got back Down Below. Now they’re having a temple in their name. They’re very proud of it. They're not supposed to come back, but I'll warn you if there's a change of plan."</p><p>“Why?” asked Aziraphale, frowning at his cup of wine.</p><p>“Why’s what?”</p><p>“Why do they have a temple in their name? Why is the king so eager to please them? What did they tell him? I heard he was quite smart for a human.”</p><p>Crawly nodded. “That he is. I guess they made a pact of some sort. As far as I know, he asked for knowledge. Always have been Beelzebub’s favourite temptation, knowledge."</p><p>“What kind of knowledge?” wondered the angel, an uneasy feeling blooming in his chest.</p><p>“Who cares? He’ll be dead in a few decades at most. Knowledge is always a good thing anyway. Right?”</p><p>Aziraphale looked at his friend, arm outstretched, cup of wine tilted in invitation, and clinked his glass with him with an inward sigh. “I guess so,” he murmured, trying to think it.</p><p>Knowledge couldn’t hurt, right?</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>Sitting on their throne, Beelzebub addressed the demons gathered around them.</p><p>“All right, everyone. Thingzz are going to change here. I gave humanzz a ritual to call any of you on Earth at a moment’s notice. Ritual can be realizzed by any human ready to sell their soulzz. I need a list of namezzz to give to the humanz so they put it on a book.”</p><p>Demons started to cheer, and the Prince of Hell raised their voice. “I can not put all of your namezz in the book! Upper demonzz and Earth representativezz will of course be in it, so any volunteer whozze rank iz less than a Duke will have to put their name on the golden urn right here. I will pick namezz tomorrow, and I’ll stop at 666. Questionzz?”</p><p>An arm raised. “Why did you put Crawly on the book? He’s no Duke!”</p><p>The Archemon sighed in annoyance. “Crawly knowzzz more about humanity than any of you. He’zz the best at temptations, and contracts have no secrets to him. Of course he will be named, you moron. Report in torture chamber number three in an hour for wasting my time. Doezz anyone have a <em>clever</em> question?”</p><p>No hand dared move.</p><p>“Excellent. Dismissed.”</p><p>Beelzebub watched their underlings scatter away with an eye-roll. Idiots, all of them. But at least the question had reminded them they hadn’t taken the time to inform Crawly of the changes to come.</p><p>Bah, that could wait next review.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I'm on vacations everyone!<br/>And I have NOTHING on my schedule for the next 17 days, so I hope I'll be able to finish this story before that!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Prisoner</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Humans are very creative little buggers. Crawly discovers their last invention and is NOT thrilled.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Yes, new chapter already! I hope to post the next one tomorrow.  I love invocation stories, and I'm having so much fun writing one!</p><p>I hope you'll like it guys!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>287 BC, Corinth.</b>
</p><p>Crawly felt it as he was handing the young woman a purse of coins.</p><p><em>Ah, shit!</em> Blessed invocations, always happening when he needed it the least! He turned hurriedly towards the human.</p><p>“Now go, and don’t turn back, Laodice. You’ll be free.”</p><p>There was uncertainty in the girl’s eyes, and Crawly blessed inwardly. He didn’t have enough time, he could feel the pull of the invocation. In a few seconds he would be gone, and Laodice was still hesitating to leave and run away from her future wedding. If she stayed, every tension between hers and her betrothed’s cities would go to rest.</p><p>Two months, two months to bring her here, on this horse, almost ready to disapear, and all of his hard work was going to crumble to dust because of a stupid human wanting money or power!</p><p>As Crawly felt his essence being dragged away, he decided that if Beelzebub ever asked him why chaos hadn’t come to Corinth as ordered, he would give them a piece of his mind.</p><p>He appeared in a circle drawn on the floor, a little dizzy as always, runes glowing around him. A young man stood facing him, a knife in one hand. Crawly made a face. Blood. Why were humans so convinced that blood was mandatory in stupid invocations?</p><p>With a sigh, he straightened his back and took a step forward. “So, what do you want, human? I am in kind of a hurry, so if you would-”</p><p>His words died on his lips as he ran into an invisible barrier.</p><p>
  <em>What the..?</em>
</p><p>Looking around, he realised the obstruction was following the edge of the invocation circle. There was new runes traced on the floor, accompanying his names. Runes he’d never seen before.</p><p>This was new. This was… not a good surprise.</p><p>From the corner of his eyes, he saw the man smile. He knew that smile, he’d seen it on the faces of so many tyrants and killers. Greed, thirst of power, the desire to instil terror in the hearts of others.</p><p>A cold chill ran down the demon’s spine as he realised he could only recognise the darkness in the human facing him because he’d seen it before. But he should have <em>sensed</em> it, felt it in his demonic core. Reaching out with his occult senses, he realized with horror that he could feel nothing outside of the circle. He was cut out from the world, prisoner, and Hell wouldn’t be able to find him were he to go missing.</p><p>Seeing the human’s face, he was pretty sure he would be missing for a long while.</p><p><em>Oh, perfect.</em> <em>Just what I needed. I’m so gonna kill Beelzebub.</em></p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><hr/><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>Far away, on another continent, an angel stopped in the middle of the road with a gasp at the sensation of a sudden <em>absence</em>.</p><p>“Oh, no… Crawly...”</p><p> </p><hr/><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p><b>28</b> <b>5</b> <b> BC, China.</b></p><p>Death plucked the last of the souls waiting for him in what had been a green plain only days ago and was now bloodied mud covered with corpses, flames slowly dying here and there. War had been there only moments ago, and he still could sense her presence not far away.</p><p>The dark figure raised his head and looked to the side as a rush of Grace swirled on itself to take the shape of a human corporation. Had he been able to squint his eyes, Death would certainly have. In an impatient gesture, he unfolded his wings of night.</p><p>“Wait!” cried Aziraphale, hurrying to catch him. “Please, wait!”</p><p>Death stopped, annoyed.*</p><p>*Not that Aziraphale could see it on his face, of course.</p><p>I HAVE NO TIME FOR YOU, PRINCIPALITY. I AM VERY BUSY TODAY.</p><p>“You’re busy <em>every</em> day,” snapped the angel, squaring his jaw. “I have been following you for months!”</p><p>I KNOW. THIS IS EXTREMELY ANNOYING. I HAVE NO WISH TO TALK TO YOU. I HAVE WORK.</p><p>“You <em>knew</em> I was searching for you?” exclaimed the angel, incensed.</p><p>YES. STOP PURSUING ME.</p><p>Aziraphale frowned. “Oh, for the love of God, just answer one question, and I shan’t bother you again!”</p><p>Death sighed inwardly. He wasn’t one to answer questions. He had nothing to answer to anyone, even God. But that angel didn’t seem to take a hint, and had been following him everywhere these last eleven months. Death was starting to understand why mosquitoes were so irritating to humans.</p><p>WHAT? He sighed, wishing he had eyes to roll.</p><p>“Are you aware of the destruction of a demon? His name is-”</p><p>Death cut him short. He almost never took interest in what was happening in the living world, focusing on his work, but he was, after all, everywhere, and such an improbable friendship was something peculiar enough even for him, who’d seen it all, to remember.</p><p>NO, CRAWLY HASN’T BEEN DESTROYED. SATISFIED? CAN I GET BACK TO MAINTAIN THE BALANCE OF THE UNIVERSE NOW?</p><p>Without waiting for an answer, Death flapped his wings and disappeared. Aziraphale stared at the empty space, and slowly sank to his knees, closing his eyes in relief and exhaustion.</p><p>“He’s alive. Thank God…”</p><p>For long seconds, the angel stayed unmoving on the burning battlefield, trying to control the wave of emotions overflowing him. Crawly was alive. He had been so certain that… but never-mind, Death was a lot of things, but not a liar.</p><p>So his friend was still existing, somewhere. Aziraphale opened his eyes again, and they were shining like ice blue flames.</p><p>Crawly was alive, and something was <em>detaining</em> him.</p><p> </p><hr/><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>Crawly was unhappy. And bored. And more than a little annoyed. His centennial review was approaching and he couldn’t miss that. Not if he wanted to avoid trouble at least. Hell didn’t care about him as long as he showed up once every hundred years with a list of deeds (most of them fictional or undeserved), took his commendations, grinned cheekily at Hastur and Ligur’s jealous glares and got back up on Earth in search of alcohol to get the stench out of his mouth.</p><p>Usually, the angel got wasted with him. Comradeship of the trenches. He always tried to be there when Aziraphale got back from his own review…</p><p>Once more, he tried to squash down the thought. No need to think of the angel, this would not be helpful. <em>It always ends the same. Don’t think about him! </em></p><p>His traitorous brain didn’t listen, though.</p><p>Aziraphale would be worried.</p><p>Or maybe he wouldn’t be. After all, they could spend decades without seeing each other.</p><p>Yes, but he was cut out from the world, right? He couldn’t feel the angel’s presence anymore, and it had to go both ways… was Aziraphale worried? He didn’t <em>care</em> about the angel’s feelings, obviously, he was a demon, but still, he had no desire to see his adversary upset because of him.</p><p><em>Maybe the angel don’t care at all,</em> suggested a dark corner of his mind. He shrugged the thought off. No, he didn’t think that, not for one second. Aziraphale cared. And sensing his demonic presence disappear like that could have only meant one thing to the angel.</p><p><em>Shit!</em> Thought Crawly for the thousandth time. <em>I’ve </em>got<em> to get out of here! I can’t have him think that!</em></p><p>In a surge of occult powers, he lashed out at the barrier, Hellfire burning around him furiously.</p><p>
  <em>LET. ME. THE FUCK. OUT!</em>
</p><p>As always, the circle on the floor barely glowed, unscathed. The fire died down and Crawly sank to the floor, exhausted.</p><p>“For Satan’s sake,” he declared tiredly to the empty room. “Just let me out. You already have everything you asked for, I’m of no use to you now, you stupid prick!”</p><p>
  <em>Just wait until I’m out. Once I’m finished with you, human, you will beg Hell to take you.</em>
</p><p>Crawly groaned and leaned his head against the invisible barrier. He was fairly certain his clothes were out of fashion by now. That alone was a capital offence.</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><hr/><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>Aziraphale already knew that his friend was not in Hell. Firstly, Crawly entering Hell wasn’t the sensation of void he’d experiment a little other a year ago. He sensed that the demon wasn’t on Earth anymore, but the absence wasn’t the same.</p><p>Second, when he had found the demon’s lodgings after a few weeks, there had been a fresh assignment waiting on the table. Obviously, Hell had no idea of its representative disappearance.</p><p>That left only Heaven, and Earth. Crawly was not in Heaven, of that the angel was almost sure. He’d gone there under false pretence, and hadn’t sensed any sign of a demonic presence.</p><p>No, Earth was the most logical place to search. If Crawly was still alive, then someone had found a way to cut him from the world. This was awfully worrying, but the good thing was that Aziraphale had a good idea of the reason. Humans usually weren’t very surprising, and the angel had lived with them long enough to know their most mundane desires. Getting sloshed with a demon every few years and telling each other stories was also helping.</p><p>It had to be someone smart enough to trap a demon and keep him prisoner. Keeping him being the most telling clue. If they kept Crawly, it meant they still wanted to use him. Wanted more and more. Envy was a mean mistress, and Aziraphale was glad about it. Whoever that human was, they would never have enough, and would never let go. He only had to search for someone who was rising above the others, someone whose luck seemed to be never-ending.</p><p>Military conquests, accession to thrones, sudden fortunes… Aziraphale made a list, and started removing names, one by one, continent after continent.</p><p> </p><hr/><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p><b>285 BC, </b> <b>Macedon.</b></p><p>Crawly was sleeping. Lately, that was all he had to do, between visits from his captor. This was always the same. He cracked an eye open, listened to the demand, snapped his fingers and got back to sleep. Being awake was too boring. Since he couldn’t grant immortality, that stupid human would surely die someday. Hopefully, he wouldn’t “give” Crawly to anyone, or the wait would never end.</p><p>The shaking was what roused him from his slumber. Quickly, he looked around, checked that the room was still empty.</p><p>Earthquake. Stroke of bloody luck. With any chance, it would damage the circle enough to let him out. In a swift motion, Crawly got to his feet and closed his eyes, feeling the stones beneath him. Just one crack, one tiny rift, the slightest fissure…</p><p>The shaking started to subside. Crawly let out a loud string of profanities.</p><p>Suddenly, everything stilled. The air itself seemed to wait in anticipation.</p><p>“Crawly?” asked a muffled voice, right behind the door.</p><p>The demon blinked, stunned.</p><p>“Aziraphale?”</p><p>The world exploded.</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><hr/><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>“Really, my dear, could you stop whining for one tiny minute?”</p><p>“Whining? <em>Whining</em>? You almost discorporated me!”</p><p>Aziraphale rolled his eyes, hiding his delight in hearing the demon’s angry tone. “I couldn’t guess the ceiling would collapse,” he declared.</p><p>“Couldn’t gu… whose fault was that? <em>You</em> made the stupid ceiling fall! It was <em>you</em>!”</p><p>The angel smiled patiently. “I will try to keep in mind to rescue you delicately in the future, dear boy.”</p><p>Crawly scowled. “Good. Appreciate it.”</p><p>They crossed the street in front of the palace, unnoticed. “What did you do to the human that kept me, angel?”</p><p>“Nothing. His stepmother is already plotting against him, and without your powers to support him, he will not be able to save himself. Let him reap what he has sown,” answered Aziraphale darkly.</p><p>Crawly shot him a glance. He’d known it, the angel had been worried. Thought him dead, probably. Revenge was pulling at the demon, asking him to get back inside that bloody palace, to rip a throat and break some limbs, but he pushed it away. Aziraphale had been free, but he was without contest the one who’d suffered the most in this affair. No way Crawly would leave him alone.</p><p>That haunted look on his friend’s face as he had finally managed to break the circle would not be something the demon would forget easily, and thinking about it only fuelled his anger and bloodlust even more, but all of this could wait.</p><p>“How did you know I was here, angel? I couldn’t sense you in that stupid circle.”</p><p>“I could not either. I first… believed you had been destroyed, but after Death told me you were-”</p><p>“Wait. What? <em>Death</em>? You <em>talked</em> to him?”</p><p>“Why, yes, I had to make sure! I couldn’t just assume you were dead, could I? I had to check.”</p><p>“With DEATH? Are you out of your mind?” shouted Crawly.</p><p>“I would appreciate it if you could just stop yelling at me, dear. I have a dreadful headache, and I dearly wish for some quiet.”</p><p>“Fuck. Yeah, ok. Shit, you’re… you’re insane, angel. Just saying. Let’s get somewhere else, and I’ll buy you some wine and something to eat. You’ll tell me what happened while I was out, okay?”</p><p>He was rewarded with a grateful smile. “That sounds really nice, dear boy. How about Alexandria? There is something I want to show you there. You will not believe what they are building on Pharos!”</p><p>Crawly followed his friend, smiling indulgently. <em>‘Thank you’</em> wasn’t in a demon’s vocabulary, but he’d be damned again if he didn’t find a way to repay the angel. Scrolls, poems, something Aziraphale would like…</p><p>He knew that he wasn’t the only one to think about the runes that had trapped him inside that summoning circle. Aziraphale had studied them attentively, had taken the book they were coming from, and was certainly trying to find a way to counter their effect in the future.</p><p>He should have felt at least a little worried. Humans had found ways to trap and control demons, after all. Knowing them, it was only the beginning. Hell would not like that report, but he couldn’t hide something this huge.</p><p>He should be worried. But as he transported himself to the other side of the sea, an angel by his side, he only felt happiness.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Next chapter will bring some whump, but of course I promise comfort!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Water</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>It's been a long time since Crowley's unpleasant experience. Every summoning since then was the easy, usual one.<br/>Until now.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Had a little trouble with that one^^<br/>Aziraphale didn't want to share is POV, like, at all!<br/>So, well... what do you want... I gave up on him and it's mostly Crowley's POV^^.<br/>That angel is way more stubborn than I am (and I can garantee you I am VERY stubborn myself^^)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>285 BC, Egypt.</b>
</p><p>“You’re sure it’s safe?”</p><p>“Of course I am sure, Crawly. I have studied this spell for weeks. Are you doubting my abilities?”</p><p>“Don’t put words in my mouth, angel. I’m just worried. It’s a huge spell, will take a lot of your energy.”</p><p>“<em>Poppycock.</em> I will be just fine, I am not the one needing to part with some of my Grace. Are you ready, dear boy?”</p><p>Aziraphale reached out, hand opened.</p><p>“I still don’t like it,” grumbled Crawly, unconsciously leaning away.</p><p>The angel’s face fell at his friend’s withdrawal. “I promise you I won’t let anyone touch it,” he assured in a pleading voice.</p><p>Crawly let out a frustrated groan, taking a step forward. Count on that stupid angel to assume he’d backed out because he didn’t trust him enough. “That’s not… I don’t… I’m not worried for <em>myself</em>, angel! What if one of your bosses sees it and realises what it is? What would happen to you then?”</p><p>The angel blinked, surprised, making Crawly wish once again he could strangle an Archangel or two, like every time Aziraphale seemed to wonder why anyone would worry for <em>him</em>, a lowly, undeserving Principality.</p><p>“They will not be able to tell, my dear. I will disguise it, so no one will see it for what it really is. Do not fret, Crawly. Now, if you are ready...”</p><p>“Okay, okay.” Crawly unfolded his wings, and chose a feather before carefully plucking it out, trying to stay stoic as the pain ran through him. Aziraphale grimaced in support.</p><p>Holding the feather in front of him, Crawly blew slowly, suffusing it with a part of his occult essence, the closest to his core he could bear to part with without leaving permanent damage. It was delicate work, forcing a part of himself into an object. He could feel the swirl of dark energy trying to escape the feather and get back to him, like water to the river. With a frown, he added another layer of protection around the object, making sure nothing could seep out of it, and handed it to his friend.</p><p>“Here you are, angel. Keep it safe, okay? Don’t let these wankers see it.”</p><p>Aziraphale took the gift with great care. He could feel the warmth coming out of the sleek black feather, radiating Crawly’s energy. “Thank you, my dear. Let’s hope I will never have to use it.”</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p><br/>
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</p><p>
  <b>814, Fuuta Tooro.</b>
</p><p>Aziraphale folded his wings into the ether and rolled his shoulders with a grimace. He needed to groom, he knew it. But wings were so <em>tedious</em> to take care of, and he had so many things to <em>do</em>. He was awfully busy, what with all the blessings to cast at every corner of the world and all the books to read and delicious new food to try…</p><p>Grooming wings was so bothersome… much more easy to ignore the itch and soreness until it truly became unbearable.</p><p><em>A little like </em><em>dealing </em><em>with Gabriel</em>, he thought bitterly, checking one last time that every animal of the herd had been thoroughly and truly blessed.</p><p>Well, that man’s farm would prosper without the shadow of a doubt. Assignment accomplished.</p><p>He <em>sh</em><em>ould</em> get back to his lodgings in the east and carry on with his orders there, he knew it. Michael’s note had been very stern on that point. But he hadn’t been in this part of the world for half a century, and wanted to visit a little more.</p><p>Michael wouldn’t check on him for at least six month anyway. She always had trouble with the notion of time. Nodding decidedly, Aziraphale headed towards the town barely visible on the horizon. If he remembered correctly (and he had a perfect memory), two centuries ago he had tasted there the best palm wine of his life. Crowley had been with him. Maybe he could buy a bottle and bring it back to the demon…</p><p>Reaching out almost unconsciously, he grazed his friend’s aura, checking on its whereabouts. Still in Australia, apparently. Maybe a little visit would be-</p><p>The occult presence eluded him brusquely. Surprised, Aziraphale blinked. He knew Crowley had felt him. He hadn’t tried to hide, after all, checking on one another was quite natural, like walking past a neighbour's house as they headed out and smiling at them in salutation.</p><p>Was Crowley avoiding him?</p><p>Frowning, he tried to follow the familiar energy. Nothing. Not even a trail. This was… it reminded him of…</p><p>
  <em>Oh, bother. I knew it would happen again someday.</em>
</p><p>They had destroyed the book that described the sigils needed to trap a demon, and searched for other copies without success. After a millennia, they’d both come to the conclusion that the book had been one-of-a-kind and the knowledge was lost forever.</p><p>It had obviously been wishful thinking.</p><p>Palm wine would have to wait, thought the angel, stone-faced. He snapped his fingers, and the black quill disappeared from the desk in the simple chamber he was occupying some two thousand miles away. The inn-keeper, who was snooping through said desk in search of something to snatch, didn’t even blink. That particular quill had never been meant to be seen by anyone besides its owner, after all.</p><p>“Right, then...” mumbled Aziraphale, focusing on the demon’s aura trapped in the feather and still trying to escape after so many years, “time to get back to where you came from.”</p><p>With a decided twist of his fingers, the feather snapped.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>Crowley groaned as his head hit the floor.</p><p>Damn freaking invocations. Couldn’t a demon sleep in peace? It was his third one this decade. Was his name so attractive that it was chosen amongst all the others with such regularity?</p><p>Of course it was. His sigil was the most stylish in all of Hell.</p><p>He stretched and sat up with a sigh, looking around to take in his surroundings.</p><p>Oh. Several humans. Not new, exactly. It was starting to be a trend lately. Until around a century ago, it was almost always one human calling to make a pact, but now it was quite the fashion to create little groups of worshippers.</p><p>Crowley still had a problem with the concept of Hell’s <em>idolaters</em>.</p><p>Anyway, better make the deal, offer the ladies whatever they wished to gain in exchange for their immortal souls and send the contracts back Down, then finish his night while he still could.</p><p>He never liked to be responsible for a human signing a Hellish contract, but honestly, anyone stupid enough to summon a demon had it coming.</p><p>His sleepy mind was trying to process a nagging sensation of wrongness. Something felt <em>fishy</em>.</p><p>He reached out, frowning. His occult energy stopped dead as it reached the edge of the summoning circle.</p><p>
  <em>Aw, not again!</em>
</p><p>He looked down at the sigils, expecting the familiar seal that had already trapped him once in the past. He knew that seal, he’d had months to memorize it.</p><p>Crowley blinked at the writings on the floor. It wasn’t the same.</p><p>Stupid humans had invented a new way to imprison him. This day was getting better by the second.</p><p>That’s when he saw one of the women around the circle lift a jug of water. He didn’t need to wonder what kind of water <em>this</em> was.</p><p>He knew about it, of course. Every demon knew what Holy Water was. He also knew that angels weren’t the only one able to produce it now. But it was the first time a human actually thought of using it against him. Or against any demon, as far as he was aware.</p><p>He’d liked Yeshua. Really, kid was smart and understanding, not judgemental one bit.</p><p>But he could have done without the man teaching his representatives on Earth how to bless water. <em>Really</em>.</p><p>Did Satan taught Humanity how to summon Hellfire? No! This was <em>cheating</em>!</p><p>With a waxy smile, he carefully stepped back, eyes fixed on the jug.</p><p>“Hello, ladies. How can I help you?”</p><p>
  <em>Aziraphale, get your ass over here!</em>
</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>The occult energy shot out of the quill at a speed that would have put light to shame. Aziraphale reacted instinctively.</p><p>To pretty much everyone, angels included, Aziraphale gave the impression of being a soft, slow, well-meaning but a little sluggish angel.</p><p>Those people tended to ignore that the Principality had been a warrior. Choosing not to act on his instincts didn’t mean he didn’t <em>have</em> them. Aziraphale jumped out of his corporation, following the faint trace of demonic Grace through ether.</p><p>He hadn’t thought it would go <em>this</em> fast, hadn’t imagined for one minute that he would need to abandon his human (ish) body behind, but this was not a time for thinking. His only goal at the moment was to track Crowley’s energy, to follow it to its destination. Nothing else mattered.</p><p>The vacant corporation hit the ground, waking up an owl who fluffed up indignantly before going back to its well-deserved nap.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>Crowley idly wondered which had hurt the most, his Fall, or <em>this</em>. He couldn’t quite decide, since remembering the exact amount of pain he’d experienced falling required the use of at least <em>some</em> part of his mind.</p><p>Said mind was focused on one job right now: warning him that he was <em>burning</em> and would probably <em>die</em> if he didn’t run away from whatever was attacking him.</p><p>Not very helpful when one was trapped and unable to move. Not helpful at all.</p><p>“Tell us where your master is, demon,” asked the human holding the jar.</p><p>He unclenched his jaws, trying to remember how to make them work. “<em><b>Fuck</b></em>! I <em>told</em> you already! He’s <em>out of reach</em>, what were you <em>thinking</em>, you stupid freaks? Satan doesn’t come to Earth! Believe me, you don’t want him to!”</p><p>The oldest woman, clearly the leader, if the jewellery was any sign, tilted her head to the jug bearer. Crowley’s eyes widened in terror.</p><p>“<b>No no no no no!</b> You don’t want to do this! I’m telling you the bloody <em>truth</em>, there’s no need to-”</p><p>His voice caught in his throat at the sight of the woman’s finger touching the clear liquid.</p><p>One drop. He’d only had one drop, on his hand, and he still felt like his whole arm was burning through the bone, turning to ashes. He wouldn’t survive another one, he was fairly certain of that. Wasn’t even sure he could survive at all, even if the crazy women set him free <em>now</em>.</p><p>“Hold your other hand up, demon,” ordered the leader.</p><p>Cursing inwardly, Crowley complied. Not like he had any choice.</p><p><em>This is the end. It’s going to hurt, and I’</em><em>ll never see a unicorn again</em>, thought the demon in a haze.</p><p>Something hit him, but not onto his corporeal body. This was coming from the ethereal realm, softly touching his true form and immediately mingling with it. A part of him he’d forgot he’d lost. His pain-addled brain barely acknowledged it.</p><p>“Excuse me?” asked a polite, familiar, if a little disembodied voice. “Can I inquire as to-”</p><p>There was a sharp gasp, and a second of perfect immobility. The kind of second where the whole world is just about to tip over an invisible but very <em>present</em> edge.</p><p>Crowley was almost certain something important was happening, but he focused on the drop of water trailing down a slender finger, just above his good hand. The jar lady wasn’t looking at him anymore, her interest elsewhere, and Crowley wondered briefly what would be worse: dying in agony under his torturer’s scrutiny, or dying in agony unnoticed.</p><p>He was leaning towards the second one, which was a shame, since it was about to happen.</p><p>The droplet… dropped. Then sizzled mid-air and disappeared.</p><p><em>Is it evaporati</em><em>ng</em><em> or </em><em>boiling</em><em>? </em>PonderedCrowley’s foggy mind. He was almost certain there was a difference. Water was not supposed to act like this, right?</p><p>He could barely register the cries, followed by deadly silence. A wave of heat surrounded him for a brief moment, but this too was nothing compared to the burning pain still eating at him, crawling up his arm, eating him alive.</p><p>The jar was nowhere to be seen now. Where was the human? She had been there, towering over him, just a second ago...</p><p>“Crowley?”</p><p>He knew that voice. Well, more or less. It seemed a little different, but it was definitely angelic.</p><p>“Hiya, Aziraphale... How’s life?” asked the demon in a slur. Poor angel sounded a little stressed. Probably had a bad review from Heaven’s wankers. Crowley needed to find wine and some sugary treat to help him get better.</p><p>“Oh, you are not fine at all, my dear. Do not move, I will… I will come back right away. I promise. Two shakes of a lamb’s tail!”</p><p>Crowley’s fear was suddenly back. “Wait. Wh… what? Where are you going..?”</p><p>“I’ll be back in a minute!” promised Aziraphale urgently.</p><p>“No! Don’t-” Crowley couldn’t feel anything behind the summoning circle, but he still felt his friend leaving.</p><p><em>I can’t believe you’re abandoning me</em>, he thought as darkness finally overcame him.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>It only took a second for Aziraphale to regain his corporation, gather himself up, snap his finger to destroy the remnants of the broken quill on the ground, and transport back to Crowley’s side.</p><p>The demon wasn’t kneeling anymore, but sprawled on the floor, his blackened hand outstretched as if to catch something. <em>Or someone</em>.</p><p>Aziraphale’s heart stopped.</p><p>“Crowley! Crowley, can you hear me?”</p><p>The demon didn’t move.</p><p>The angel’s logical part of his brain, aware that it was <em>not</em> in control at the moment, took furious notes, committing the sigils and their position to memory as Aziraphale extended his wings and raised a hand, destroying the circle in an outburst of power that was absolutely unnecessary for such an easy task.</p><p>He kneeled near his friend, gingerly touched his shoulder, then sagged in relief.</p><p>“I am here, my dear. I am back. You will be all right. You will be just fine,” he promised, trying to believe his own words.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p><em>Burning</em>. He was burning again, falling right into the deepest pit of Hell. Boiling sulphur was waiting for him to-</p><p>With a cry, Crowley opened his eyes, reaching out to grab at something, anything that could stop his descent.</p><p>Cold hands closed on his wrists. “Calm down, dear boy,” murmured a warm, soothing voice. “Everything will be just fine.”</p><p><em>Oh</em>. This wasn’t Hell, then. Aziraphale wouldn’t be there if it was.</p><p>Crowley took a long breath, and looked around. Chamber. Too sunny to be Hell, and too clustered to be Heaven, so it was…</p><p><em>H</em><em>ome</em>.</p><p>“You came back.”</p><p>Aziraphale pouted. “Really, Crowley, no need to seem so surprised. Of course I came back! I needed my corporation to break that awful circle, is all. I had to leave it behind to find you. How do you feel?”</p><p>The demon took in his friend’s tensed face and felt a slight tremor in the hands still holding his wrists. He realised his entire arm was encased in white fabric.</p><p>“I feel… alive. That’s certainly better than my highest expectations, to be honest. How does it look?”</p><p>The angel scrunched up his nose. “Not very good, but your corporation will heal. I had to cut out and destroy a little of your essence, though. So very sorry about that...”</p><p>Crowley let out a weak laugh. “It will come back. I’m surprised you managed to save me at all. It was Holy Water. I should be… you know.”</p><p>Aziraphale’s mouth thinned even more than it already was, and Crowley tried not to cringe at the wrath that burned in his eyes for a brief moment. “The blessing is only as powerful as the faith of the human performing it. Thank the Lord this water wasn’t very potent.”</p><p>“Where are the women? They were from your side, you know? Decided to destroy Satan, believe it or not. Wanted me to call out for him,” recounted Crowley with another laugh. He really, really wanted to see his angel smile. This… this Aziraphale was not the real deal. It was creepy.</p><p>“They will not bother anyone else in the future,” retorted Aziraphale in a tight voice.</p><p>Wisely, the demon let the subject drop. “Do you have something to drink? I heard alcohol was very good against pain, and my hand is killing me, angel.”</p><p>Finally, a little smile tugged at the corner of the angel’s mouth. Crowley’s chest unclenched.</p><p>Everything was going to be fine, indeed.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>THIS is the day Aziraphale realised humanity could use Holy Water against Crowley. He wasn't THAT worried, since he had the feather and knew he would be able to free the demon shortly, but seeing his friend in this state was a very (very) bad revelation. Humans couldn't just detain Crowley. They could also kill him. Not only discorporate, but destroy him.<br/>From now on, invocations and Holy Water will be Aziraphale's worst nightmare.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Vengeance</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Crowley is very surprised by his new conjurer.<br/>He did NOT expect this.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>New chapter, new summon!!<br/>Hope you'll like it! I wrote this one very fast, and I can't wait to start on the next one^^</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>1209, France.</p><p>Crowley had formed a habit since his encounter with the <em>bloody crazy fucking ladies and their stupid water</em>, as he called it. First thing he ever did when invoked was check the circle and its sigils.</p><p>For the first time in four hundred years, his wariness didn't turn to relief. There it was, that bloody trapping word, right behind his name.</p><p>
  <em>Flames.</em>
</p><p>At once, he launched into the second thing he always did when invoked: checking for any sign of a bottle, urn, vial, anything that could contain liquid. His conjurer was empty-handed, an old book opened at his feet. Crowley let out a small sigh.</p><p>Maybe this wouldn't be awful. The man was alone, and clearly nervous. With any luck, he could trick him, convince him to let him go. He was good at this, after all. Leaning against the invisible wall of his prison, he waited. It was always the same. They asked, or, for the most brave (or, rather, stupid) ones, they demanded what they expected from him. Not this one, though. He seemed as hesitant as Aziraphale in front of multiple pastries, only minus the delighted smile.</p><p>“Sooo...” he drawled after a minute of silence. “I'm here now. Maybe time to, you know... let me know why?"</p><p>The human let out a shaky breath, and Crowley relaxed even more. He was, of course, unable to use his powers outside of the circle, except to grant the conjurer's wishes, but he knew that face. Had seen it a lot, in all shapes and colours. This wasn't someone wanting to hurt or coerce, this was someone wanting to make a deal.</p><p>On second thought, realised the demon, looking a little more closely at the human, it wasn't even a man. It was still a boy. A trembling, white-faced, terrified kid.</p><p>Aw, bless it all! He couldn't make a deal with a freaking <em>child</em>!</p><p>“How old are you? Twelve? Don't you know demons are not playthings? What are you trying to do, stupid?” he huffed, hands on his hips.</p><p>“I am fourteen! I’m a man!”</p><p>The protest was, at least in Crowley’s opinion, a little spoiled by the boy’s changing voice.</p><p>“You’re a brat, that’s what you are. Wasting my time and putting your life in danger,” scoffed Crowley, as he finally felt the sensation he was waiting for. A tiny part of his essence finding its way back, after so many years.</p><p>That could only mean one thing: Aziraphale had broken the feather Crowley had given him after Holy Water Day and was probably already there, without his corporation, ready to smite.</p><p>It also meant he would have to pluck <em>another</em> of his feathers and infuse it with his essence because of a stupid human brat.</p><p>Crowley prepared himself to yell that he wasn’t under threat, but Aziraphale, wherever he was, seemed to understand the situation. The light stayed the same, the ground didn’t shake, and the only sign of an angelic spirit wandering about in the room was a disapproving tutting sound only Crowley’s demonic hearing could catch.</p><p>The demon slouched a little more, and grinned darkly “All right, what do you want then? You’ve got to have called me for a reason. No one invokes a demon for fun, right?”*</p><p> </p><p>*Crowley would be very surprised by the eighties.</p><p> </p><p>“I want you to kill someone,” declared the boy darkly, his countenance turning from nervous to certain.</p><p>Crowley blinked. He hadn’t expect that.</p><p>“Aaaaaaar… yeah… right, course I… I can help with that, but...” oh, fuck it all, why not bluff a little? Test the waters, so to speak? “You know, I <em>can</em> kill someone for you, obviously,” he started, ignoring a huff coming from his left, right outside the circle, “But it’s a life for a life.”</p><p>“It’s okay,” answered the boy hurriedly. “You can have mine.”</p><p>Crowley grimaced. “Yeah, that’s not how it works,” he lied, “you see, you have to give someone else’s life. An innocent.”</p><p>“What? But… I’m offering you <em>my</em> life! It should be enough!”</p><p>The demon shook his head with a sigh. “Kid. You’re trying to kill someone. I’m just a tool. Once I’ve done it, you won’t be innocent any more, hmm? I need a spotless soul. Don’t you have some saint aunt you have no use for or something? Annoying little cousins?”</p><p>The boy took a step back. “No! I won’t <em>give</em> you someone!”</p><p>“Then I won’t kill someone for you. Do you have something else in mind? Something a little less...” <em>stupid</em>, he wanted to say, but opted for a diplomatic “pricy?”</p><p>“I… I don’t know,” murmured the child, and he looked so utterly lost that Crowley groaned inwardly. He was going to help the little bugger, wasn’t he? Satan below, he was going to be <em>nice</em>.</p><p>“What’s your name, kid?” he asked in a gruffy voice.</p><p>“Paulin,” murmured the child, looking at his feet.</p><p>“Who do you want to kill, Paulin? And why?”</p><p>“A soldier,” mumbled the boy, still looking down.</p><p>Crowley scrunched up his nose. Oh, this was not heading anywhere funny. “That’s not very specific. Would any soldier do, or do you have someone in mind?”</p><p>At that, Paulin raised his eyes angrily. “I don’t know his name! That’s why I called you! I want to know his name, can you do that? I’ll kill him myself if I have to!”</p><p>“Who did he kill?”</p><p>The boy’s eyes widened. Crowley huffed. “Come on, no need to look so surprised. You’ve just invoked a demon to kill a soldier, boy. I’m not totally stupid. So, who was it?”</p><p>The young human shrugged. “My family. He killed them all, and they were in a church. You can’t kill someone in a church!”</p><p>“You can kill someone anywhere,” murmured a soft voice behind the boy. He started and turned around, facing Aziraphale’s sad smile.</p><p>“Hi, angel.”</p><p>“Hello, dear.” Aziraphale took the boy’s hand in his, and looked into his eyes. “Was your family in Bézier, my dear?”</p><p>Paulin nodded wordlessly.</p><p>“There is no way of knowing who exactly hurt your family,” lied the angel. “And even if you could, revenge wouldn’t help you.”</p><p>Paulin snatched his hand our of Aziraphale’s grasp. “I won’t forget!”</p><p>“Of course not. You will never forget, but you can move on. I know it is difficult to believe, but you can. If you want to make a difference, if you really want to do something about that awful affair… Then there is something I can do for you.”</p><p>The boy nodded enthusiastically. “Anything! I can fight! If you tell me where to find them, I can fight with the others!”</p><p>“Children don’t <em>fight</em>,” snapped Crowley, voice stern. His friend looked at him and approached the circle, examining it, then turned to the book on the floor.</p><p>“What an interesting volume,” he murmured, hands clasped behind his back. “You know how to read, then. Do you also know how to write?”</p><p>Paulin nodded. “I learned with the monks. I was training with them to enter the order as a scribe when they attacked my home town. I stole the book and ran away to call a demon.”</p><p>The angel nodded thoughtfully. “I imagine I can grant your wish, my young fellow, but I need something in exchange. Everything has a price, after all.”</p><p>“Do you want my soul?” asked Paulin. “I can give you my soul.”</p><p>He was met with an angelic glare. “You should not bargain yourself so easily, child! But I imagine the promise that you will not offer you soul to anyone else will suffice. With that book, of course.”</p><p>Paulin nodded and offered his hand. The angel shook it, Crowley trying not to smirk.</p><p>“What will you do with it?” asked the boy in a little voice.</p><p>“Why, read it of course,” answered Aziraphale absent-mindedly, examining the runes around the invocation circle.</p><p>“Not the book, my soul!” insisted Paulin.</p><p>Aziraphale looked up in surprise. “Nothing. It isn’t mine!”</p><p>“I just sold it to you!”</p><p>Crowley chuckled, and met a very stern look from his angel.</p><p>“You certainly did not. You merely promised never to offer it to anyone else. I do not want it, so I guess you will have to keep it, my child. Now, if you would be so kind as to stop talking for a few minutes, I need to focus.”</p><p>Paulin blinked in confusion, opened his mouth, closed it, then sat on the floor.</p><p>“Handled it nicely, angel,” murmured Crowley, following his friend around the circle. “Any idea how to stop him from fighting? He wants revenge. No need to read his mind to know it. You won’t stop him with some nonsensical <em>turn the other cheek</em> crap speech.”</p><p>Aziraphale huffed. “It appears I do have an idea, thank you very much. It may not work, but I have a feeling it shall. Oh, here it is,” he added happily, erasing the trapping sigil with his foot. Crowley stretched and sauntered out of the circle.</p><p>“Thanks, angel. Wine’s on me next time.”</p><p>“I certainly hope so! Now, Paulin, will you be so kind as to take my hand? We have to travel some distance and it will be easier that way.”</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>They appeared under a bridge, and Paulin looked around with surprise. This did not look like a fortified city, and there wasn’t any guard. There wasn’t anyone…</p><p>“Where am I? Where are the others?”</p><p>“Oh, we will get there, dear. I only needed to make a little detour...” answered Aziraphale, stepping away, towards a small bundle of clothes. Paulin and Crowley followed him. The demon sighed.</p><p>“How old is she, angel?” he asked softly. Paulin finally realised the bundle was a human being, deeply asleep.</p><p>“Six, I think. She lost everyone in the attack. Hadn’t spoken a word since, not that anyone cares. I think she will survive a few days at best. She hasn’t got a chance on her own.”</p><p>“But… you’re an angel, aren’t you?” pointed Paulin. “You can help her!”</p><p>Aziraphale sighed sadly. “I wish I could, my dear. But there is too much misery in this world, and it isn’t my place to change it. The only person that can help right now is you.”</p><p>The boy gaped. “Me? What do you mean, me? I have no powers!”</p><p>“You have the power to write and read. Scribes are heavily needed everywhere. You could earn enough money with your ability to feed and clothe the both of you.”</p><p>“I don’t know her!” yelled the boy, angry. “I don’t want to become a scribe, I want to fight!”</p><p>“And you can.” Aziraphale assured. “You have a choice. Everyone should have a choice. That girl’s name is Alix. She is from the same town as you. She survived because her mother hid her, and she’s lost everyone, just like you. She has been walking on her own these last two days, and she hasn’t eaten since. Either you stay here with her and save her life, or I will transport you to Carcassonne. The city is next on that little… crusade. What is your choice?”</p><p>Crowley grimaced. <em>Give the boy some time to process, angel! They’re impetuous at this age!</em></p><p>He snapped his fingers, and the girl sat up, looking around in fear. Seeing neither angel nor demon, she looked at Paulin with huge, soulful eyes, and shrank in on herself, terrified.</p><p>Paulin thought of his little sister Marie, and bit his lips.</p><p>“I won’t hurt you”, he murmured, taking a step forward and crouching a few metres from her.</p><p>Crowley and Aziraphale exchanged a glance, then the angel snapped his fingers and Paulin’s satchel filled with a writing box, cheese, and bread.</p><p>They both disappeared in a blink, unnoticed.</p><p>The choice had been made.</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Both children had been blessed by an angel and a demon... they will be healthy and happy, and will stay as close as brothers and sisters can be all their lives, I promise.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Heaven's finest</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Something dreadfull is happening. All around the world, demons are summoned, trapped and destroyed. Our favourite angel and demon are on the case.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I'm back everyone! So sorry for the delay. I have an exam in two weeks and that gets me a little stressed, I guess, so writing is a little hard lately. But I'm still here, I promise!!<br/>I hope you'll like today's summoning.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Australia, 1533</p><p>Crowley looked down at the puddle of goo in the middle of the invocation circle, and bit his lip so hard he tasted his own blood. At his side, Aziraphale exhaled shakily.</p><p>It was the third time they discovered that kind of scene in the last two years, and it was… well it was fucking terrifying, that’s what it was. Hell was trying to hide it, but as Earth’s representative Crowley had been informed of the destruction of demons. Five had disappeared forever, and if he wasn’t mistaken this little puddle was the sixth.</p><p>He should be afraid. He had been so far, after all. Someone was invoking and destroying demons, and it was only a matter of time before it happened to him. Up until now, each discovery had terrified him a little more, while Aziraphale’s ire had only grown. But this time was different.</p><p>He looked around, at the sand, the cold fireplace, the dry bushes.</p><p>A hand touched lightly between his shoulder blades, an offer of comfort.</p><p>“I am so sorry, Crowley.”</p><p>And, oh, Aziraphale’s voice was all wobbly. The demon added that offence to his growing list. He hissed, clenching his fists to his sides. Whoever was responsible would have Hell to pay.</p><p>This part of Australia was <em>his</em> . Under his fucking <em>protection</em> . It had been his home for centuries, with the exception of a few decades in Greece. He always came back there between assignments. People here were simple, and joyful , and always accepted him, yellow eyed and weird white-skinned as he was, and someone was <em>corrupting</em> them. Not in a funny way.</p><p>“Do you still think there is no occult or ethereal influence in this little charade, Aziraphale?” he growled through gritted teeth, turning to send his friend a scathing look.</p><p>It had been a constant source of argument between them lately, Crowley being convinced that Heaven had to be behind all this while Aziraphale maintained it only was humanity demonstrating some of its darkest side.</p><p>The angel closed his eyes, his hand falling to his side. “No. I do not,” he murmured.</p><p>Difficult not to understand that humans were being manipulated. This part of the world had never <em>heard</em> of summoning. No book from Sumer or any translation of them should have reached Australia. And they certainly never learnt to bless water.</p><p>“Someone is teaching humans how to invoke, trap, and destroy demons,” said Aziraphale, anger colouring his voice. “Maybe they have been doing it from the start.”</p><p>And, oh, that was not a good thought, but it could be possible, reflected Crowley. Maybe his own encounter with Holy Water centuries ago was part of it all. A rehearsal of some sort.</p><p>“Heaven, do you reckon?” he asked.</p><p>Aziraphale nodded, anguish visible on his face. “I don’t understand. They didn’t tell me a thing. I swear I had no idea-”</p><p>Crowley raised a hand to cut him. “Stop right now, you’re embarrassing yourself, stupid. I know, okay? We’ve been investigating this shit together for months. I know you have nothing to do with it.”</p><p>The angel wrung his hands. “But if Heaven really is behind all this… they <em>destroyed</em> your fellow demons, Crowley! This is simply monstrous! I am ever so sorry!”</p><p>Crowley shrugged, unfazed. Using his favourite humans as tools in an ineffable war was much more annoying than the destruction of some wanker he didn’t even like. But Aziraphale was soft and didn’t like the idea of anyone being erased from existence. That was both sweet and awfully stupid. Any demon would gladly destroy the angel, given the opportunity.*</p><p>*Any demon but Crowley, obviously.</p><p>“T’s okay, angel. Not like we were mates or anything. Do you sense anything?”</p><p>His friend shook his head. “No. Whoever it is, they’re very good at hiding their presence.”</p><p>Crowley squinted his eyes. The angel was thinking of something, he could see it on his face. “Spill it. What’s wrong?”</p><p>Another fluttering of hands. “It is just that… why hide? Humans can’t sense ethereal energy. If they are covering their tracks, then they have to know someone is after them...”</p><p>Cold dread froze Crowley’s heart. “Do you think they’re watching us?”</p><p>“Dear boy, if that was the case, I think we would both be painfully aware of it by now.”</p><p>The demon took a step back. “We have to stay away from each other. Go back to Europe, angel!”</p><p>Aziraphale rolled his eyes. “I will certainly not. Stop being ridiculous, my dear.”</p><p>But Crowley was circling his friend, head shooting from side to side frantically. “There’s no one watching for now. Just go, I’ll find a way to keep in touch. Don’t contact me until all this shit is over!”</p><p>“I just told you I would not-” started the angel.</p><p>“Aziraphale, are you listening? It’s dangerous to talk to me right now! Go away, you imbecile!”</p><p>“I am not going <em>anywhere</em> as long as demons are being <em>destroyed</em>, Crowley!” yelled Aziraphale in a furious tone.</p><p>And that had Crowley snap his mouth shut. Aziraphale almost never lost his temper. He stopped walking and looked closely at his friend. Feet firmly planted on the ground, balled fists, tensed shoulders and jaw. But the eyes were what really sold it. This was an angel at peak stubbornness, and there would be no way to move him anytime soon. There was something else in his features, something only Crowley could see.</p><p>Aziraphale was scared. Scared for him.</p><p><em>Of bloody course he his,</em> chided a little voice at the back of Crowley’s mind. <em>Six demons are </em> dead <em>, you stupid prick! What did you expect?</em></p><p>“Okay,” he said slowly, trying to fight the awfully fond, warm feeling blooming in his chest. “Okay, angel. No worries. We’ll find a way. It’s going to be fine.”</p><p>“It bloody will be,” snapped Aziraphale, “once I’ll find who is responsible for all this.”</p><p>Crowley laughed dryly. “What do you intend to do? Smite an angel? Do you think that would be wise?”</p><p>He realised as he said it that this was exactly the kind of thing that stupid angel could do. Aziraphale was an angel of habits most of the time, but under stress the Principality turned about as predictable as an overexcited kitten*.</p><p>*For those who have never been owned by a cat, it meant “not predictable in the slightest”.</p><p>Aziraphale had a faraway look that did nothing to assuage Crowley’s feeling of impending doom. The angel was devising a strategy. On one hand, it was a good thing, since his friend was a warrior at heart and could have taught a thing or two to Sun Tzu himself. On the other hand, considering the angel’s sense of self-preservation and his propensity to put himself in danger to help others, it was a bad, <em>bad</em> thing.</p><p>“What are you thinking? Whatever it is I don’t like it.”</p><p>“We cannot let Heaven use humanity this way,” declared Aziraphale. “Teaching perfectly peaceful people to hurt and destroy is against free will.”</p><p>Crowley grimaced. He could have argued that no human society was completely innocent (not since Eden, at least) and that destroying demons wasn’t considered a sin from an ineffable point of view, but he chose to remain silent, mostly because Aziraphale openly disagreeing with Heaven’s actions was rare enough NOT to argue.</p><p>“I should go Down Below, see if I can get some intell. Maybe Dagon or Beelzebub know something we don’t. And you should head Up and, you know, snoop a little. Discretely of course. Don’t get caught.”</p><p>Aziraphale huffed, incensed. “I can perfectly be inconspicuous!” he declared haughtily*.</p><p>*1941 would teach Crowley how wrong that declaration had been.</p><p>“That’s good then, because if we play this bad we are f-”</p><p>Crowley disappearing was the only thing saving him from a very stern lecture about proper language.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>Aziraphale looked at the empty space in front of him, frozen on the spot.</p><p>Something was yelling quite loudly inside his mind, and he couldn’t for the life of him understand a word of it.</p><p>Crowley had been <em>right here</em>. Now he wasn’t.</p><p>It took him only two seconds, two long seconds of perfect stillness, of denial.</p><p>This was not happening. It had to be his eyes deceiving him. Or Crowley playing a stupid prank.</p><p>He looked down at the green pool of slime at his feet, eyes widening in horror.</p><p>“Shit!” he yelled, snatching the black feather out of his pocket and snapping its shaft.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p><em>Oh. Of course. We should have guessed</em>, thought Crowley, looking past the circle of humans to eye the angel smiling in the background.</p><p>He was so, so dead. Aziraphale wouldn’t be able to help him out this time. Sandalphon was one of his bosses, after all.</p><p>He looked around, too overwhelmed to be afraid yet. Every human was carrying a full-to-the-brim urn. This was a <em>lot</em> of Holy Water. He would probably not even have the time to suffer. Strangely, this was <em>not</em> a consolation.</p><p>Sandalphon raised a hand, and the humans stepped back, taking the water with them. Crowley started to breathe again. Then the angel approached and looked him up and down.</p><p>“Demon Crawly, is it? You are Hell’s special correspondent on earth, if our files are correct.”</p><p>Crowley absent-mindedly wondered how accurate said files really were if they still hadn’t caught up on his new name.</p><p>“I imagine you have a lot going on, temptations, assignments… you are in on Hell’s every secret, aren’t you?”</p><p>There was glee in the angel’s eyes. Crowley shuddered inwardly. He knew enough about Sandalphon to never want to get near the wanker, and here he was, trapped, completely at his mercy. This was not going to be quick, he already knew it.</p><p>This was a great day. The only thing that could make things even worse would be-</p><p>“Sandalphon?” asked a polite voice.</p><p>The demon’s eyes widened in pure terror. He knew this voice.</p><p>
  <em> Fuck. Fuck, fuck and FUCK! </em>
</p><p>He tried, really tried, to catch Aziraphale’s eyes and silently beg him to leave him here and save his freaking skin. But his angel was very good at pretending not to understand silent conversation when it suited him.</p><p>Sandalphon had turned to eye the newcomer, looking slightly annoyed.</p><p>“What is it, Aziraphale? Don’t you see I am busy?”</p><p>The angel nervously darted his eyes to an urn of water, before looking back at Sandalphon. “Yes, about that-” he started.</p><p>“I really don’t understand how you couldn’t get rid of this adversary of yours sooner, Aziraphale,” cut in the Archangel with a superior smile. “He was very easy to trap. You are even less effective than I thought. You should be careful, you know. You are awfully close to become a real failure. The Almighty is merciful, but not <em>that</em> merciful.”</p><p>Aziraphale swallowed visibly, and Crowley forgot about his situation for a second, eyeing Sandalphon’s carotid artery intently.</p><p>“Well...” started Aziraphale, hands tightening on the piece of parchment he was holding, “I wouldn’t say easy, exactly… he let himself be trapped, you see? That’s why I came here as soon as I could.”</p><p>“Let himself?” asked Sandalphon, thankfully not seeing Crowley’s flabbergasted expression.</p><p>“Yes, exactly,” prompted Aziraphale hurriedly, waving the parchment to draw his boss’ attention while praying for Crowley to <em>catch up and play along, for God’s sake! </em>“He is bait, actually! I spied on him lately, and I intercepted a correspondence between him and the Lord of the Flies. Smiting him would lead to a lot of trouble. A war between Heaven and Hell, even! Before Armageddon! Imagine how awful this would be! Why, it would be thwarting the Almighty’s Great Plan! We cannot let this happen, can we?”</p><p>“What are you talking about, Aziraphale?” huffed Sandalphon, losing his patience.</p><p>“Hell’s plans!” squeaked the angel, handing him the document. “They apparently have this ridiculous notion that Heaven is trying to destroy demons. Lord Beelzebub is insisting that some of their underlings have been eradicated without the slightest reason.” He rolled his eyes with an amused huff. “Pure slander, of course. We would never smite anyone unprompted. Except, of course, if that is the Lord’s orders.”</p><p><em>What a load of absolute shit</em>, thought Crowley, impressed. That Aziraphale had been able to utter all this without even a smile was beyond his understanding. He would never have been able to keep a straight face himself.</p><p>Heaven and Hell were <em>supposed</em> to play by the rules and wait for Armageddon to slay their adversaries without mercy in a civilised way. But there always had been a rogue agent or two getting a little eager and <em>accidentally</em> erasing someone from the universe for good. It was officially “frowned upon”.</p><p>Sandalphon looked at the parchment, eyebrows knitted together. His eyes were widening in alarm as he kept reading and Crowley wondered what exactly was written on the bloody thing to elicit that kind of response.</p><p>Aziraphale shed light for him. “As you can see, this is a list of angelic names. Dagon has apparently found a way to summon angels and Hell is planning to use that power to invoke and destroy us with Hellfire. They need proof, of course, and that is why Crowley here has acted as bait for the last few months. He is in direct contact with Hell, and anything done to him will be relayed Below. Then retaliation will begin.”</p><p>“My name is on that list!” cried Sandalphon, very not okay with it.</p><p>Aziraphale nodded seriously. “I know. Every Archangel and higher level angel is on it. So is mine. This is awfully inconvenient, but do not be afraid, the Almighty would never let such a travesty happen. She knows all of this is slander. She sees it all, after all.”</p><p>Sandalphon was not looking good. White as a sheet, he looked up at Crowley, still trapped in his summoning circle. The demon raised an eyebrow and winked.</p><p>“You… You tried to trick me!”</p><p>Crowley grinned. “Yup. Almost got you, I have to say. Shame we got interrupted before you started torturing me. But it’s only a matter of time.”</p><p>He turned to his friend, who offered him a smug smile. Crowley snarled. “Can’t you just stop the thwarting from time to time, Principality? You’re spoiling my fun!”</p><p>“I will never let you soil the pristine reputation of Heaven’s finest angel, you foul fiend!” exclaimed Aziraphale, the epitome of overplaying. Crowley fought the urge to pinch the bridge of his nose in second-hand embarrassment.</p><p>Sandalphon’s suspicion was legendary. Fortunately, his ego was even greater. He straightened himself at the words ‘Heaven’s finest’, and didn’t question it one second. He snapped his fingers and every human in the room fell to the floor, Holy Water disappearing instantly. The angel smiled coldly, his golden tooth shining.</p><p>“Very impressive, Aziraphale. Maybe we will make something out of you, after all. Keep up the good work.”</p><p>He disappeared hurriedly, taking the parchment with him.</p><p><em>What the fuck?</em> mouthed Crowley. Aziraphale sighed, tension draining out of his body, and destroyed the trapping sigil.</p><p>“Are you out of your mind?” whispered the demon. “What if they can sense your Grace on this thing?</p><p>“I took it from your stack and used your quill and ink. It will be fine,” answered the angel, sitting on the floor and closing his eyes.</p><p>Crowley eyed him in concern. The floor was dirty, and Aziraphale didn’t seem to mind one bit. “Are you all right?”</p><p>“I am fine, Crowley. I just need a minute. It was quite taxing to write that list while knowing you were trapped here.”</p><p>“Do you think it will work? What if Heaven checks with Hell? You know information is exchanged sometimes, right?”</p><p>“Of course I know,” huffed the angel. “I guess you will have to invent your own version for your bosses. I trust you on that, you have the greatest imagination, my dear.”</p><p>Crowley preened a little. He did. The best way would be to pretend the list and the bait was his idea, and that he had let Aziraphale find about it. The summoning of angels was not a thing, but he had lied about it and the angels had bought it.</p><p>No more invocations, he realised, looking around at the sleeping humans and empty urns. At least… not <em>that</em> kind.</p><p>Aziraphale wasn’t looking very relieved. “Hey. You did it, angel. You stopped it all. That’s great, we should celebrate.”</p><p>“He gave them knowledge, Crowley. We spent centuries trying to find every book with your name on it, and he just spilled it all around the globe,” mumbled the angel.</p><p>Crowley grimaced. Yes, this was not ideal. But he was alive, and Heaven wouldn’t dare interfere in that way again. That was a victory in his book.</p><p>“If there are new books, we’ll find them. For now, let’s just go eat something nice and drink something even nicer. My treat. Come on, angel, don’t look so gloomy. Did you see the look on his face? I thought he was about to shit himself. Nice touch with the <em>She sees it all</em>, by the way. This was priceless.</p><p>“Well, She does,” grumbled Aziraphale with a little pout. “And Sandalphon should be reminded of it more often. Where did you intend to eat exactly? I am not sure this is a good idea. My appetite is quite spoiled.”</p><p>“I was thinking South America. I’m in the mood for some sweet potatoes,” said the demon in his best tempting voice.</p><p>Aziraphale lightened up immediately. “Oh, I do love sweet potatoes! It has been so long since I had some!”</p><p><em>I know</em>, thought Crowley with an inward smile.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I do NOT like Sandalphon at all, and someday I will have him receive a demonic punch in the face.<br/>Probably the day Crowley will learn about him punching Aziraphale in the gut.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Fire</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>This chapter starts just after the famous 1800 deleted scene, when Gabriel gave Aziraphale a medal and told him Michael would replace him on Earth.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hi everyone! I'm back!<br/>Sorry for the long silence lately, I had exams and was studying every evening, and I just couldn't write when I tried.<br/>So happy it's behind me now^^</p><p>I hope you'll enjoy this long chapter. It's good to be back 🖤</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>1800, London.</p><p> </p><p>“Hiya, angel!”</p><p>Aziraphale turned on his heels at the jingle of the bell and crossed his arms, glaring in silence. Crowley blinked behind his glasses, his smile slipping off. “What?” he asked, frowning, blindly shoving the chocolate box and the flowers on a little table near the entry.</p><p>He had been sure that his little act had convinced Gabriel to change his mind and leave Aziraphale on Earth after all. What if it hadn’t been enough? Did he need another ruse? Would he have to discorporate Michael again and again until someone realised that bringing Aziraphale back was the best option?</p><p>He could do that, he thought desperately. It would be risky, Michael being the strongest of all of Heaven’s fucking angels, but if he could take her by surprise... <br/>“What’s wrong? Are they still trying to make you go? I thought… what did they say? Aziraphale, don’t tell me they still want you to go!”</p><p>The angel squinted his eyes. “So it <em>was</em> you! I knew it! Gabriel just left after telling me I wouldn’t be relocated after all. What did you do to make him change his mind?”</p><p>Crowley’s shoulder slumped in relief. “The fuck, Aziraphale! I thought you were still going!” He looked at his friend’s unhappy features and stuttered. “Wait… wh… do… did you <em>want</em> to go? Are you disappointed?”</p><p>Aziraphale huffed loudly. “Of course I am not disappointed! Now tell me exactly what you have done to achieve such a result! This is Gabriel we are talking about! Not a human you can… tempt to look elsewhere, or use a miracle on! What did you do?”</p><p>Crowley hid his relief as best he could and smiled wickedly, leaning against a bookshelf in his best ‘devilishly handsome’ pose. “Aw, angel, were you worried about me?”</p><p>Aziraphale scoffed, and rolled his eyes for good measure. “I was certainly not! Me, worrying about a demon! How preposterous!” He grabbed a pile of books on his counter and transported them decidedly to a nearby shelf, not sparing a glance at his friend. Back turned to the entry, he asked in what he hoped was a casual voice*, “So, no danger whatsoever? No Archangel hot on your heels?”</p><p>*It was not.</p><p><br/>Crowley smirked, trying not to appear fond. It was quite hard, with Aziraphale trying and failing so spectacularly to keep the ‘hereditary enemies’ act going on. “Nope. No trouble at all. Your boss is so stupid it was like stealing a lollipop from a baby. A not very bright baby, at that.”</p><p>Aziraphale shot him a scathing look. “You are talking about one of God’s most trusted angels, Crowley!”<br/>“I knooow,” crooned the demon, his smile widening.</p><p>They shared a look for several seconds, then Aziraphale’s gaze softened as it landed on the gifts Crowley had brought, and he put his books down with one of his delighted wiggle. “Oh, my dear! Flowers and chocolate! You shouldn’t have!”</p><p>“Only the best for you, angel. T’s an important day, after all. You finally got that bookshop you were always blabbering about. I have to admit I started to think you weren’t serious about it.”</p><p>Aziraphale was too occupied opening the lid of the chocolate box to pout. “What do you mean, not serious? Of course I was!”</p><p>“You told me about it like fifty years ago!<br/>“I had to find the right location,” declared the angel haughtily before humming in delight as he tasted one of the chocolates. “Oh, this is simply scrumptious! Let me put these beautiful flowers into a vase, then we’ll open a nice bottle of champagne.”<br/>“Don’t go and tell them they’re beautiful! I didn’t terrify them all the way here for you to destroy my hard work!”<br/>“Yes, yes, whatever you say, dear boy,” answered Aziraphale absent-mindedly, still crooning at the roses.</p><p>“Angel! You’re giving them ideas!” protested Crowley, stomping after him.<br/>He only got a blinding smile as an answer and decided to sulk on the couch that seemed to be waiting for him near the little kitchenette where Aziraphale was taking care of the bouquet. With a snap of his fingers, his top hat and cane found a place on the impressive coat rack.</p><p>“So. Bookshop. Care to give me the grand tour?” He asked as his friend came back with a bottle and two glasses. Aziraphale blinked at him in confusion.<br/>“Oh. Yes, of course, if you are interested. But I am afraid there isn’t much else to see, except for the little apartment upstairs. The kitchen there is much larger.”<br/>Crowley took his glass with a nod and clinked it with his friend. “It’s not that I’m interested. But that’s why you invited me, right? To show me your new lair?”</p><p>“Well,” started Aziraphale, looking into his glass like it held every secret of the universe. “Not exactly. There is something I want to show you, but it isn’t the bookshop, per say.”<br/>The demon squinted his eyes. That tone of voice and the way the angel avoided looking at him was telling enough. Aziraphale had his 'I did something not angelic in the slightest and I feel bad about it, but not enough to regret it' face. </p><p>Crowley loved this face. He'd seen it for the first time in Eden and never got tired of it.<br/>“What have you done this time?” he groaned, trying to hide his glee. “I hope you didn’t get into trouble again, because I’m awfully busy right now. Not sure I would have time to help.”</p><p>This got him a look at least. Said look was pointed, unimpressed, and amused at the same time, a feat only Aziraphale could accomplish. Crowley pouted in distaste and took another sip of champagne. That was the problem with millennia-long friendships. The angel knew him too well to believe such a blatant lie.</p><p>“What’s it about?” he growled. <br/>He was feeling a little put out to know he hadn’t been invited to celebrate Aziraphale’s grand opening but to help in what seemed to be a purely work related matter. No way he would show his disappointment though. He was a big bad demon, way too cool to care about that sort of ridiculous thing.</p><p>The angel finished his glass and got up excitedly. “It’s here, in this room! Not on this plane of vision of course, and, hm, you will have to look close even in the ethereal plane, I tried to conceal it as best as I could. Look up, and tell me what you see.”</p><p>Frowning, Crowley looked at the ceiling, and pushed his glasses in his hair. Blinked. Blinked another time. “Is that… s’that an invocation circle?” he finally asked in disbelief.</p><p>“It is a version of it, yes.”<br/>Aziraphale looked way too pleased with himself. Crowley squinted. “That’s my name on it. Why did you put my name on your bloody ceiling?”</p><p>The angel raised his hands hurriedly. “Do not worry, my dear, I have no intention of actually invoking you!”<br/>“Well, good to know,” answered the demon in a teasing tone, raising one eyebrow. “Cause, you know, you invoking and trapping me on your ceiling was one of my major concerns for sooo long.”</p><p>His friend huffed but decided to ignore the obvious bait. “I draw its twin under the rug. Of course you won’t appear on the ceiling. It took me quite some time and research, but I think it shall work. Every time you are invoked in the future, you will first be transported here. Consider it like a detour of some sort. The circle will hold you for almost two minutes before the real invocation takes place. And I will be able to follow you easily that way. If I am not home, the Bookshop will warn me and I’ll appear here directly.”</p><p>Crowley frowned. “Angel, we already have a perfectly valid way of tracking me down, and painting my name on your shop’s walls is not discreet at all!”<br/>“It is way better than the feather, dear. Remember the seventeenth century? All the summoning everywhere? You had to pull out so many of them I was afraid you would lose the ability to fly for a while! If I am touching you when the detour stops taking effect, I will follow you.”<br/>“Seems like a very complicated plan just to get your hands on me,” remarked Crowley with a leering grin.</p><p>“Can you please be a little serious, dear?”<br/>“You know you only had to ask, angel,” teased the demon, both to see the angel roll his eyes and heave a long-suffering sigh (always a treat) and to hide how touched he was by the gesture.</p><p>Inventing that detour thingy couldn’t have been easy. And he was fairly sure the only reason Aziraphale had waited so long before telling him was that he hadn’t wanted to give him false hopes before being sure that his plan would work.<br/>Knowing that he wouldn’t be alone anymore when summoned, not even in the first minutes of it, was awfully reassuring. And Aziraphale had a point with the feathers. He only hoped he wouldn’t have to try this new ruse for a long time.</p><p>“Crowley,” asked the angel, replenishing their glasses, “are you free this Friday? It is the grand opening, and I wondered if you would be amenable to a lunch out before everyone’s arrival.”</p><p>Crowley sprawled on the sofa, placing his limbs haphazardly and affecting a nonchalant slouch. “I can push around an appointment or two, yeah.”<br/>Aziraphale beamed, handing him his glass.</p><p> </p><hr/><p><br/>1802, London.</p><p><br/>The rush of energy from the back room made Aziraphale’s senses tingle. He snapped his book shut and got up in a hurry.</p><p>This was demonic energy, in his back room. No demon could materialise in his bookshop save one. The fact that he was not on speaking terms with said demon at the moment was of no importance*. Crowley was being summoned.</p><p>*Quite a silly fight, even by their standards. Aziraphale had declined to share a bottle of wine with the demon, stating that he was trying to stop sullying his corporation and live a more angelic life. Things had escalated pretty quickly after this, and words had been exchanged. Aziraphale had abandoned his diet in less than a week, but wasn't ready to admit it to his friend yet.</p><p><br/>“We’re closed! Closing time! Come back tomorrow!” he declared, making a shooing motion with both arms at the two startled clients perusing the shelves.<br/>“But… it’s only two in the afternoon,” remarked one of them weakly as he was pushed towards the door.<br/>“Inventory time!” yelled the angel, slamming the door shut before rushing towards the back room. “Crowley? Is that you?”<br/>“Who do you want it to be, stupid?” answered the well-known voice. Aziraphale heard the relief it hid. He was feeling the same, to be honest. Thinking the circle would work and having proof of it were two very different things.</p><p>The demon was in the middle of the room, looking pissed off. Aziraphale stopped in the doorway and let out a sigh. “Oh, dear Lord, Crowley...”<br/>“Don’t bring Her into this!” snapped the demon. “Freaking invocations, always happening when I’m in the middle of an important temptation! I was this close to having him! This close, angel!” he roared, holding out a hand, fingers separated only by a hair’s breadth.</p><p>“Honestly, my dear, I do not think this changed anything about the result,” huffed the angel, reaching out to take his hand. “Not with that awful thing on your face.”</p><p>Crowley raised an eyebrow and squeezed the offered digits. Out of the question to talk about what was about to happen. They both knew what was about to happen, and talking about it was not an option. “I’m trendy. You couldn’t understand.”<br/>“Facial hair does not become you, Crowley. How many times will I have to tell you?”<br/>“Let me be clear, angel, the day I take fashion advice from you is the day someone will steal my corporation and pretend to be me!”<br/>Aziraphale blinked. “Pretending to be you...” he murmured, the beginning of an idea forming in his mind.</p><p>They felt the pull of the summoning one second before it happened. Both entities tightened their grip on the other’s hand. “Hold on, angel, it’s pretty shaky the first time.”</p><p>The landing was hard, and the paved floor didn’t help one bit. The only thing preventing Aziraphale from falling was Crowley’s hand, and the angel regained his footing quickly, looking around to appraise the danger. It seemed like a cave. There was a summoning circle of course, with a binding rune, as was usual these last centuries. The drawing had been made with blood, a rooster if the poor heap of feathers in a corner was any indication. Nine humans were gathered around the circle, dressed in white robes and wearing reversed cross around their necks.</p><p>“A group. Again,” stated Crowley in a bored voice. “Bloody Satanists,” he added under his breath.</p><p>Aziraphale tutted. “Do not criticize your followers, dear, that is unbecoming. And Satanists never tried to hurt you before, at least, so my presence here won’t be required this time. This is good news. Nothing bad will happen today.”</p><p>Of course, such a reckless declaration couldn’t be left unanswered. A door opened, letting a tall woman in a black dress enter. Crowley looked her up and down appraisingly, wondering if he would be able to pull off that kind of stunning gear, while Aziraphale tilted his head, staring at the woman. Who stared back.</p><p>“Oh, dear,” breathed the angel.<br/>Crowley’s head snapped to him. “What? Oh, dear what? I don’t like that kind of Oh, dear.”<br/>“I think that woman is a witch, Crowley. A powerful one at that.”</p><p>The black figure pointed to the angel. “This one isn’t a demon. His aura is bright! Use the defensive spell!”<br/>“My dear Madam,” started the angel, straightening haughtily, “I would have you know that spells will be ineffective against me. May I add that treating your guests that way isn’t very sporting?”</p><p>Crowley was looking at the circle of Satanists, who seemed to be murmuring an incantation of some sort. A word reached his ears, and his eyes widened in panic.<strong> “Fuck! Get down, angel!”</strong></p><p>There was a loud Woof, and Aziraphale felt something crash against him, throwing him to the floor. His back hit something hard, and black obscured his vision.</p><p><strong>“Aziraphale!”</strong> yelled Crowley’s voice. With a grunt, the angel opened his eyes. Crowley’s face was only inches away, and he looked positively terrified. Strangely, the dark was still here, preventing him to see anything besides his friend.</p><p><em>Oh</em>, he thought in a haze. <em>That’s his wings</em>.<br/>“Aziraphale!” cried the demon, shaking him slightly. “Do you hear me?”<br/>He couldn't leave his dear friend so worried. With great effort, the angel forced his mouth to form words.</p><p>“I am not totally deaf yet, dear.”<br/>Crowley sighed in relief, then snapped angrily. “Not the moment to get sssarcastic, you moron! It’s Hellfire! They’re shooting Hellfire at usss!”<br/>“That’s… that’s not possible,” mumbled the angel, frowning in disbelief. His mind seemed to be trapped in molasses. It was both disturbing and frustrating.</p><p>“Oh, oh, I’m ssorry, your Prinssipality! Do you want me to let you check for yourssself?”<br/>This at least didn't need any thinking to answer to. Arguing with Crowley was as natural as breathing was to humans by now. “No need to be so snappish, Crowley!”<br/>“Well excuse me for getting a little on edge when ssomeone is shooting bloody Hellfire at my bloody friend!”</p><p>Aziraphale sighed in annoyance, and tried to peek through Crowley’s feathers. Hellfire. This was bad. He needed to... what did he need? Oh, yes, free Crowley. Hellfire was demonic. Crowley would take care of it. “Do you think you could control it, dear?”<br/>“How should I know, sstupid? I have no power outside this blesssed circle! Sstay down!”</p><p>Strangely, being called stupid by the demon seemed to be what his angelic brain needed to speed up. “I have to destroy that trapping rune, Crowley, or neither of us is going anywhere. If I go very quick I should be able to...”</p><p>The demon growled, his eyes flashing. “No. Nope, no way. Too dangerous.” <br/>He knew Aziraphale would have to do it, though. Only the angel could reach out of the circle to free him, and only he could stop that fire before it got out of control. Humans couldn’t handle Hellfire, even humans witches. This was not going to end well for the neighbourhood, but Crowley couldn’t care less. Aziraphale would die before the neighbourhood.</p><p>Crowley suddenly gasped. “Wait, got an idea.”<br/>He closed his eyes, took a huge breath, then got up brusquely, arms raised.<br/>Even if his powers couldn’t work outside of the circle without the invoker’s permission, he was still allowed miracles inside of it. The tornado of fire was swirling around them, but every flame stopped dead at the limit of the demon’s trap, where time had stopped. He could vaguely hear screaming somewhere beyond the wall of flames.</p><p>“Oh, jolly clever, my dear! Give me just a second,” panted Aziraphale, getting on his feet and hurrying to the edge of the circle, looking at the runes. He could feel his mind clearing, and suddenly realised why.<br/>The smoke. Of course, Hellfire smoke would be bad for him!<br/>“Take your time, angel, no rush at all,” answered Crowley sarcastically, shoulders tensing. Stopping time was not an easy task, but stopping it in these conditions was next to impossible.</p><p>“Found it!” exclaimed Aziraphale’s excitedly, erasing the binding rune with his foot. Every human in the room stopped moving.</p><p>Crowley rolled his neck, closing his eyes for a second with a sigh of pleasure. When he opened them again, they were entirely yellow.<br/>Up until a few seconds ago, he had been afraid. It had happened lots of time before (living in literal Hell tended to do that to you) and he was very familiar with the feeling, but today it had reached new heights.</p><p>There was Hellfire. Right next to his angel. Almost touching him. Hellfire had a mind of its own, and even with his hold on time, Crowley could feel the hunger of the flames, all of them focused on the ethereal presence, wanting to eat and destroy it.<br/>This was a scary situation. Fucking terrifying, even.</p><p>You didn't survive a Fall and the turmoil after that, everyone trying to end on top, without a good survival instinct. Crowley had honed his fight or flight reflex to perfection, and it always, always pointed to flight when given the choice. But there wasn't any choice here, not with Aziraphale surrounded by the flames, and his occult nature had switched from “escaping” to “cornered”.</p><p>You don't want to make a demon feel that way. Crowley could feel his fangs grow in his mouth, and his skin turn to scales, as he looked at the circle of helpless, fragile, flammable humans.</p><p>There was a threat, aimed at something that was his, and he had to get rid of it.<br/>He chuckled, and extended his wings, mantling one of them over Aziraphale, who looked a little bewildered.</p><p>The demon smiled horribly at the humans around them. Most of them didn’t seem happy at all, and were trying to escape (not that Hellfire would let them). Some of them only seemed dead. </p><p>“You wanted fire, guys? You got it.”<br/>“Oh, dear,” murmured the angel from under the dark feathers.</p><p>At Crowley’s gesture, the fire roared, and rushed back so fast it hit all four walls in less than half a second, then it disappeared, leaving nothing in its wake, not even cinders.<br/>For a minute, nothing moved. Then the angel cleared his throat tentatively and stepped away from his shelter, looking at his friend's face.</p><p>“Crowley? Dear? Are you quite all right?”</p><p>Crowley snarled, looking around for other threats, pushing the angel back under his feathers.<br/>“Enough of that, dear boy,” chided Aziraphale, trying to push the wing away. “Everything is fine now.”<br/>“Don't move!” barked the demon.</p><p>Aziraphale raised an eyebrow. “Crowley, you are being ridiculous. There is nothing menacing us anymore, and I have no intention of staying here any longer. Let us go back to the bookshop.”</p><p>Crowley's more demonic side wanted to hiss and put that blasted angel into submission, but some very insistent part of his brain was yanking him back and pushing him away. Aziraphale looked ill. The observation was enough to bring Crowley to himself in an instant.</p><p>He blinked. “You all right, angel?”</p><p>His friend smiled with relief. “I am, thank you. Just feeling a little weak, I guess. I do not think I will be able to teleport any time soon.”<br/>“Ooooh,” groaned Crowley, understanding. “Hellfire fumes. Of bloody course! I kind of emptied myself of miracles too. We'll have to walk.”<br/>“Oh, how lovely,” mumbled Aziraphale, never a big fan of exercise.</p><p>The cave, they realised as they stepped out of it, was situated pretty deep, and they both eyed the rows of stone stairs warily.</p><p>“Oh, fuck me!” yelled Crowley.<br/>“No need to be rude!” chided his friend. “You are completely washed out, and we cannot teleport, so unless you have some clever idea right now, I suggest we start our ascent.”<br/>A groan answered him.</p><p>For a few minutes, silence reigned in the staircase, only punctuated by heavy footsteps. Enough time for a tired demon to regain the energy to quarrel. </p><p>Because Aziraphale looked way too pale, and had that tight-lipped expression that meant he was not fine and trying to hide it. The angel didn’t need concern and gentleness right now, he needed to be annoyed, to think about something else.</p><p>Crowley needed that too, to be honest. The last thing he wanted to do right now was imagine what would have happened had he reacted one second later. He’d tackled the angel to the ground just in time.<br/>He didn’t want to think about who in Hell had been stupid enough to give Hellfire to humans either*. Even Hastur wasn’t that dumb. He would have to go Down and tell Beelzebub about this little adventure (angel excepted, obviously).</p><p>*But he intended to. Very soon.</p><p><br/>Fortunately, they were in the middle of a fight right now. Had been before that little adventure.</p><p>“Oh, Crowley,” mocked the demon in a surprisingly good imitation of Aziraphale’s voice, “stop tempting me to indulge that much in human alcohol, it will tarnish my soul!”<br/>“Well, Gabriel seemed to think it could,” argued the angel, frowning at a streak of grease on his trousers.</p><p>“Your fucking soul seems pretty shiny to me! Even a human witch can spot it from five miles away! So next time I arrive with a bottle of red, don’t give me that crappy argument! Especially if it comes from that wanker!”<br/>“She was seeing my aura, not my soul,” declared Aziraphale with a pout. “It is not the same. And I only refused a drink one time! Once!”<br/>“You’ve got to be kidding me, you stubborn bastard! Aura and soul are linked! You know they’re linked! And the witch said you’re bright as fuck!”</p><p>The demon stopped yelling to add under his breath (just loud enough to be heard), “At least she said your aura is.”</p><p>The angel gasped in outrage.<br/>“Are you insulting my intelligence?”<br/>“You refused <em>wine</em>!”<br/>“It was one time! Four months ago! I apologize, all right? It won’t happen again!”<br/>“It better not!”<br/>“You are insufferable,” huffed Aziraphale in his holier-than-thou tone that always made Crowley roll his eyes.</p><p>Quarrel settled, they continued to climb in silence. Wine was waiting at the bookshop.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Last chapter will be fun. No more angst^^<br/>Well, except for our over-angsty demon of course. 😎</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. And one time he Didn't</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Aziraphale has a solution to avoid Crowley getting trapped in a circle.<br/>But the demon doesn't agree with it at all.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>FINALLY! I feel so ashamed for making you wait this long!</p><p>There is something in the midde of that chapter that I posted already as a ficlet a long time ago, but I decided to copy it here because it belonged in this story^^<br/>There is ANOTHER ficlet that should be put here, but I don't want to add it, the chapter is long enough already, ha ha!<br/>So I'll put a link on the end note in case you want to read it.</p><p>Thank you all for your patience!!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>1807, London.</p><p>Crowley was pacing the bookshop’s back-room like a tiger in a cage. “<em>No</em>. Are you out of your mind?”</p><p>“On the contrary, my dear, I think it is quite a reasonable idea. Exchanging our corporations when you are summoned would prevent you from being trapped… and I would be able to handle the situation for you and escape without any problem.”</p><p>“Like last time?” snapped the demon.</p><p>“Really, dear boy. We both know it will not happen again. You told me Beelzebub had forbidden demons to give Hellfire to humanity in the future.”</p><p>Crowley shook his head, burying his hands deep in his pockets. “I’m not doing this. It’s my business, not yours. Not sending you there in my stead.”</p><p>Putting his glass on the coffee table, Aziraphale stood up. “Crowley, listen to me! It would be so much safer, and no one would have to <em>know</em> about it! You will appear here for the first minutes anyway, and it is more than enough time to exchange our bodies. Then I would be the one to end in a circle, and the trapping runes wouldn’t work on me! Neither would Holy Water!”</p><p>“You’re mad. I knew it would happen eventually. Gone completely bonkers,” muttered the demon, looking at him warily.</p><p>“Crowley-”</p><p>“I don’t even want to <em>talk</em> about it! Either you let it go or you’re going to finish this bottle on your own, Aziraphale!”</p><p>The angel straightened up, standing his ground. “I will not let you deflect the subject. This is about your <em>security</em>, Crowley!”</p><p>The demon growled. “My security is none of your beeswax, angel!”</p><p>Aziraphale’s face turned an interesting shade of red. “I <em>beg your pardon</em>? Are you telling me you did not need my help all these times? You certainly could have fooled me!”</p><p>His friend hissed angrily. “That’s it, I’m out of here! Have a nice century.”</p><p>With a snap of his fingers, Crowley materialised his sunglasses from the desk to his nose and headed to the door in a few long strides, Aziraphale winced at the sound of it slamming shut and huffed angrily, fists clenched at his side.</p><p>“I will <em>not</em> yield,” he declared to the empty room. “I know I am right!”</p><p>He bit his lip, locked the door, and looked outside.</p><p>“He will come back,” he declared with a stern little nod.</p><p>He wished his voice would sound a little more convincing.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>1812, London. </p><p>Crowley had trouble with Satanists. Not that he disapproved, of course, but the idea of humans willing to sell their soul for power was unsettling. Why? Humans weren’t stupid, even if some of their action made it sometimes difficult to remember they had a functional brain. They could perfectly understand the difference between eighty more years (at most) of fulfilled life and… an eternity of suffering. No? Eternity was forever, for Satan’s sake! How could anyone be so bloody stupid?</p><p>Anyway, it was good for business, and they loved the idea of worshippers, Below, so…</p><p>Well, so here he was. Again. Meeting with bloody Satanists for a “ritual”.</p><p>Crowley was already bored. After a few hundreds of years, you were bound to have seen it all…</p><p>Silver knives, pentagrams, white dresses (why the fucking Heaven <em>white</em>? He had no idea. But it almost always was. Or red).</p><p>Then blood, or a little sacrifice to make things even more gross. Mostly chickens. Twice, it had been human girls, but Crowley had put his foot down, declared the girl wasn’t “pure enough” to be offered to the Dark Lord (Purity. Ha! Like humans had an expiration date!) and that the offering of a good bottle of red wine would replace blood very nicely. Preferably unopened.</p><p>After the “sacrifice” came chants, stupid promises, more chants, burning of very potent herbs (most of the time, potent enough that no one could notice that their guest of honour was stealing the wine) and a bloody ridiculous banquet to end it all.</p><p>Crowley was annoyed. He had been invited to a Marquess’ party that night, and that would have been so much more fun…</p><p>But work first, right?</p><p>He sighed, waiting through the first of a long series of incantations. This was going to be a freaking wasted night. And there wasn’t even wine.</p><p>Which was strange. No sacrifice? That was a first. Well, good thing, that. Shame about the wine, of course, but it wasn’t like he would have anyone to drink it with anyway. Not these last five years, at least.</p><p><em>Stupid</em> angel and his <em>stupid</em> ideas. This kind of assignment always made him consider going back to the bookshop to mend fences, then let his friend commiserate over his dreadful night and get sloshed together.</p><p>No. No way he would be the one to make the first move.</p><p>Already bored, Crowley waited while the circle of white robes intoned another sentence. A word had him frowning. Was that… Enochian?</p><p>Strange. Some humans knew about Enochian, but why use Heaven’s language in a satanist ceremony?</p><p>The demon suddenly straightened with the nagging feeling that he had walked into a trap. He looked around. No trap, no weapon ready to strike. He didn’t feel threatened, and still…</p><p>Still, there was something unnerving in that room. Fear was slowly mounting in him. Squinting his eyes, he scanned the people, the walls, the ceiling, the floor.</p><p>Floor. Pentagram in a circle. Demonic writing around the…</p><p>Wait. That wasn’t only demonic. There was some Enochian here too. Not sentences, only words, scattered amongst the demonic runes.</p><p><em>Trap. Bow. Sacrifice</em> <em>.</em></p><p>And a name.</p><p>HOLY FUCK! Thought Crowley, his claws and fangs growing without a thought.</p><p><em>Too late</em>, he realised with a feeling that resembled very much terror. <em>Too bloody late</em>. The incantation had ended while he was reading these stupid words.</p><p>A flash of blinding divine light illuminated the room, and every human took a step back, raising their hands in protection. The sound of a body dropping on the floorboard broke the silence.</p><p>Crowley’s sunglasses had been enough of a barrier, and contrary to the humans, he could see. For a second, there was no movement coming from the circle of chalk. Only the limp, lifeless form in the middle of it, and the demon felt his stomach turn to ice. Oh he knew that corporation. He’d know it anywhere, even without those tanned clothes and that distinctive tartan scarf.</p><p>Then one of the humans started to speak, the demonic litany to Bend a Will, and the trapped body jerked violently.</p><p>A blood-curdling scream shook the whole room, resonating on the mortal as well as the ethereal plane, and Crowley bent double under the overwhelming pain accompanying it. It was terrifying, hearing that voice speak such an agony.</p><p>“<strong>STOP THAT!”</strong> he yelled with all the powers of Hell underlining his command, and the human froze mid-sentence.</p><p>The demon realised he’d stopped time without thinking about it. The cry died down, replaced with ragged breaths that were half sobs. Crowley was very much feeling like crying himself.</p><p>“Aziraphale,” he croaked softly, stumbling to the invocation circle. “Aziraphale!”</p><p>The angel had curled on himself on the floor, but stopped breathing as he heard his name. A strangled sound escaped him, and it sounded like a question.</p><p>“Yeah, that’s me. T’s all right, angel. I’ll… I’ll get you out of here, okay? Don’t worry, it won’t take a minute.”</p><p>He started examining the writings around the circle, but couldn’t focus on it, the scream replaying again and again in his mind.</p><p>The angel slowly unfolded and sat down, clasping his hands on his lap, and Crowley knew it was to hide their trembling.</p><p>“Erase the invoking rune first, then the channelling one, then my name.” Aziraphale’s voice was slow and collected. Crowley could tell that all of his friend’s remaining energy was used to keep it steady. He nodded, and erased the runes and the angelic name.</p><p>“Binding rune. Trapping word,” continued the angel, and Crowley followed his instruction, carefully avoiding to look up. Finally, the circle broke, and Aziraphale sagged in relief.</p><p>“Better?” asked the demon, glancing sideways at his friend’s face.</p><p>He pretended not to see it was tear-stained.</p><p>“Perfectly tickety-boo, dear boy. Would you… that is, could you help me get up?”</p><p>“Course, Aziraphale. Anything. Just ask.”</p><p>Getting the angel on his feet took a long minute. Finally, the two immortal entities stood stiffly in the middle of the room, the angel leaning against his friend for support.</p><p>“Want to get back to your bookshop? I could… I could transport us there.”</p><p>Aziraphale’s face showed relief for a brief moment, then he looked around, and closed his eyes.</p><p>“Better not. These people… they can contact Hell, isn’t it? You cannot just disappear with the angel they intended to, ah… offer you, I imagine.”</p><p>“I think you were today’s sacrifice. I’m sorry, angel, I didn’t know, and when I realised it was too late...”</p><p>Aziraphale patted his shoulder awkwardly. “Do not fret, my dear. I feel much better now. I will just… pop back to the bookshop, and rest a little. I will be fine in a jiffy.”</p><p>“The Heaven you will! I’m not leaving you alone in that state!” argued Crowley.</p><p>“You have to. You cannot afford for these humans to doubt you. You could, I don’t know… pretend you destroyed me and carry on?”</p><p>Crowley snapped his fingers, and the humans disappeared. “I’d rather pretend that their plan backfired and they have been smote by the angel they tried to summon.”</p><p>“Where did you send them?” asked the angel disapprovingly.</p><p>“Don’t know, don’t care. Somewhere unpleasant I hope. Come on, let me bring you home.”</p><p>Aziraphale bit his lip, frowning in anguish. Crowley knew what was about to happen. The angel couldn’t outright accept help from a demon. And he certainly shouldn’t offer it either.</p><p>“You know,” he said slowly, gathering his best tempting voice, “I had a stroke of bad luck lately, and no one to listen to me complain about my last failed temptation… I could use someone lending an ear.”</p><p>That got him a weak smile. He counted it as a victory. Aziraphale didn’t even take the time to ponder. He had to be exhausted not to fight at all, thought the demon with a pang of worry.</p><p>“I imagine it would be the compassionate thing to do. I don’t really have a choice...”</p><p>“No, you don’t. It is your angelic duty after all. Listening to grievances, soothing disappointment, all that stuff, that’s your turf,” approved Crowley, nodding seriously.</p><p>“Well if I have to listen to your whining, I will probably need more than one bottle. Why don’t you… transport us to the shop? I have a crate of white you will like, I think.”</p><p>Crowley snapped his fingers again, and they were both in the bookshop. He helped the angel sit on his usual armchair and hovered over him with concern.</p><p>Summoning wasn’t easy. It required the right runes, the right candles, the precise invocation. All these years, Crowley had tried (with the angel’s help) to avoid being summoned at all costs, and now he’d learned he wasn’t the only possible target. This was frightening. This couldn’t happen ever again! His brain was overloaded with questions, and as usual, they all got out without the slightest filter.</p><p>“How do you feel? Is there something I can do? How on Earth did they <em>do</em> that? What did you feel exactly when it happened? Did you know you could be summoned?”</p><p>Aziraphale tightened his lips and frowned a little. “I really am <em>fine</em>, dear boy, I promise you. This adventure was… uncomfortable, but I will be right as rain very soon. Now be a lamb and fetch us something to drink, will you? I’d rather not talk about it right now...”</p><p>“Yes. Yes, of course, I… I’ll be back in a minute,” answered Crowley, taking a step back. <em>Stupid demon, asking hurtful questions! Overbearing ass!</em> He chided himself internally, walking away.</p><p>“Crowley?” called Aziraphale after him. He spun on himself in a blur.</p><p>“Yes?”</p><p>The angel smiled fondly, and Crowley felt his stomach unclench for the first time in the last half hour.</p><p>“You can stay after our nightcap and sleep on the couch, if you are feeling tired.”</p><p>They both knew Crowley wasn't going anywhere soon, but the offer was part of their millennia-long game. He didn’t intend to get out of the shop, at least not as long as his friend seemed to need him.</p><p>“Thanks, angel. I’m exhausted.”</p><p>“Good. And I promise you we will talk about… about all this tomorrow.”</p><p>The demon sent him a relieved smile. “That would be great. Cause I don’t want that to happen ever again, Aziraphale.”</p><p>“You know, my dear,” answered the angel thoughtfully, “I believe we are thinking the same.”</p><p> </p><p>They drank late into the night, then Crowley fell asleep, relieved to see their little spat forgotten.</p><p>At least, forgotten until the following morning, when Crowley woke up to the sight of Aziraphale handing him a cup of tea. The demon took it gratefully, emptied it in one go, and cleared his head with a demonic miracle.</p><p>“Give me one of your feathers, angel.”</p><p>His friend blinked in confusion. “I beg your pardon?”</p><p>“Feather. Like mine. Infuse one with your Grace and give it to me. You got lucky I was there when they summoned you. I need to be able to track you down next time.”</p><p>The angel huffed. “I hardly think the situation will present itself again. Angel summoning is not as popular as demon.”</p><p>Crowley hissed through gritted teeth. “Are you <em>daft</em>? They did it once, they can do it again! I need to be able to find you! The feather trick is the only way to keep you safe!”</p><p>Aziraphale rolled his shoulders, like he was about to unfold his wings, then stopped and gazed into space for a minute, brow creased thoughtfully.</p><p>“No,” he said calmly. “I do not think I will do that. You want to prevent this from happening again? Then there is a perfectly reasonable way to do it. I can arrange the runes for my summoning to be rerouted here too, after all.”</p><p>Crowley froze. “Are you telling me you’re still onto that corporation switch idea?”</p><p>The angel huffed haughtily. “Of course I am, dear boy. But I would hate to force upon you a discussion you do not wish to have. You know your way out if that is the case.”</p><p>“Thisss is not a game, Aziraphale! You could have been desstroyed!” snapped the demon, standing up to glare at his friend.</p><p>“I am perfectly aware of that,” answered the angel, unfazed.</p><p>This was enough to have Crowley snap. That stupid angel thought this was all some kind of game. With a growl, he grabbed the other’s lapels and slammed him into the nearest bookshelf.</p><p>“I won’t have you try to manipulate me with sssomething that sseriousss! Thiss is about your sssafety, you moron!”</p><p>Not even trying to escape his grasp, Aziraphale shot him a scalding glare. “And what about <em>yours</em>, then? You do realise that, had we exchanged corporations yesterday, none of this would have happened?”</p><p>Crowley blinked. Then frowned, and let go. Exchanging corporations was not something he’d wanted to consider before because it would be dangerous for the angel. But if <em>Aziraphale</em> was the one being summoned, and they had time to exchange bodies… then the binding circle wouldn’t work on Crowley. He could get rid of the humans trying to hurt his friend without a problem. It would be--</p><p>“Okay. Let’s do this then.”</p><p>An exasperated sigh had him look back at the angel. Aziraphale made a face and shook his head. “Of course you are agreeing now. <em>Infuriating</em>, that is what you are.”</p><p>“Oi!”</p><p>“You <em>are</em>! You did not talk to me for years because I wanted to keep <em>you</em> safe, but now that the roles are reversed you find the idea perfectly reasonable!”</p><p>Crowley spluttered. “That’s not the <em>same</em>!”</p><p>Aziraphale didn’t favour him with an answer and looked away, straightening his waistcoat before sitting back on his armchair to take an aggressive sip of tea.</p><p>The doorbell jingled. Crowley growled and advanced towards the poor human, snatching his sunglasses off. “Bookshop’s closed! Get out!”</p><p>By the time the terrified customer had run away and the demon turned back to his friend, Aziraphale’s countenance had softened a little. It was quite difficult to stay mad at Crowley when he was acting so considerate.</p><p>“So. Should we give it a try? They do say that practice makes perfect, after all,” he declared, carefully putting his cup down and extending his hand.</p><p>Crowley pouted, then shrugged and grasped it. “All right. But don’t turn my clothes into tartan. I’m serious.”</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>2014, USA.</p><p> </p><p>The smoke swirled on itself and cleared, revealing a tall, lanky figure standing in the centre of the circle.</p><p><strong>“Who <em>dares</em> call upon the Ssserpent of Eden?”</strong> it hissed, and the four humans around the summoning circle took a few steps back as a dark, evil feeling suddenly flooded the room.</p><p><strong>“You will all <em>suffer</em> for thisss, you puny--”</strong> The demon suddenly stopped and took off the sunglasses that covered his eyes. The summoners recoiled some more at the sight.</p><p>Yellow eyes blinked, and their owner’s threatening stance turned into something more akin to concern. “Oh, dear. Are you all <em>children</em>?”</p><p>One of the four teenagers straightened her back. “We’re <em>adults</em>!”</p><p>“Yeah, we can drive and all! And drink too!” snapped another one. “And we summoned a demon! So don’t call us <em>children</em>!”</p><p>The ‘demon’ looked around, taking in the empty expensive bottles of whiskey and soda, the stained carpet and the steaming indoor pool. He let out a long suffering sigh. Not that he was unhappy to see that Crowley had been in no danger of being annihilated, for once, but it seemed like an awful waste of time. “Yes, I see you are all extremely mature. Did you call me for a precise purpose or were you just trying to spook yourselves?”</p><p>“We have you now, you have to obey us,” declared a boy. “So you will… you will do what you’re told!”</p><p>The demon shook his head like a disappointed schoolmaster. “My dear fellow, I am afraid I do not have to. See, you did not even add a binding rune here, and your drawing simply is atrocious! There is some chalk missing here. Why, I could walk out of it at a moment’s notice! Really it is a miracle you managed to write my name correctly at all.”</p><p>“Hey!” yelled the girl that had been silent until now. “Give us some slack! <em>You</em> try to draw a chalk circle on a waxed floor!”</p><p>“Oh, I am sorry, was this supposed to be a <em>circle</em>?” sneered Aziraphale.</p><p>“You don’t have to be such a dick!” gasped the first girl.</p><p>“For the love of- Of course I <em>do</em>! You summoned a <em>demon</em>! Who were you expecting? Mrs Maria Von Trapp? You do realise I have work, don’t you? I was in the middle of a very important endeavour when you summoned me so rudely.”*</p><p>*If trying to miracle a reluctant Christmas tinsel onto a bookshelf could be considered important endeavour.</p><p>Before any of the humans could answer, the demon walked right out of the circle and headed to the window, snatching the leather-bound book opened on a stool on his way. He shuffled through it, ignoring the startled gasps his ‘escape’ elicited.</p><p>“'The invocation of demons and the use of bounding deals'", he murmured. "I have searched for the last copies of this book for quite a while, you know. How did it even end here? Where <em>am</em> I? Your accent is American, but <em>where</em> exactly? What is this sea?” he added, pointing outside and obviously waiting for an answer.</p><p>“Gulf of Mexico,” murmured one of the teens.</p><p>“Just perfect. I need to make a phone-call. I am afraid I forgot my mobile device at home. Would you be so kind?”</p><p>“Will you… will you kill us? Or, you know, eat our souls?” asked a girl timidly, handing him her phone.</p><p>“Why on <em>Earth</em> would I do something like this? <em>S</em><em>h</em><em>ush</em>, it’s ringing. Oh, hello, dear, it is me. No, I am fine. No, I did not <em>take care </em>of them. They are not dangerous.”</p><p>A laugh could be heard from the phone. “Yes,” sighed Aziraphale, “they are kids.”</p><p>“We are NOT!” shot one of the teens in outrage.</p><p>“Can you join me here, please? You know I am not good at talking to teenagers. They are so <em>obstinate</em>.”</p><p>The phone laughed again, and Aziraphale huffed indignantly. “Would you stop making fun of me and come here? Why… Yes, as a matter of fact, I <em>am</em> in Florida. How did you know?”</p><p>He looked up from the receiver with a frown, turning to the four teenagers. “Well, I'm not sure any of them is old enough to be called a Florida man. Why?”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>So this is it! I did it!!!<br/>The Florida man ending was suggested by my awesome beta megzseattle, when I asked her about a fun state where bored teens would try to summon a demon.<br/>I didn't know any Florida man headlines, but I discovered a lot today and I had to use it here^^</p><p>To those who want another story with Crowley being summoned and Aziraphale taking his place, here's the link to my other ficlet.<br/>WARNING: Crowley is NAKED in that one.</p><p>https://archiveofourown.org/works/21785092</p><p>(Don't worry there's absolutely no need for a real warning. You know me^^)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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